I’m a female member. I went on an in-room date with a papa (a male supporter) I was meeting for the fourth time—and it was our second in-room date—but I wasn’t given any allowance. He had told me beforehand, “Next time, let’s be like lovers,” but he never said there would be no allowance. I misunderstood and thought we would simply be intimate and affectionate like a couple, so when I didn’t receive any allowance afterward, I felt empty and wondered what I was doing. I didn’t press him this time because I wanted to keep things amicable and think about continuing with him. However, I’ll have a problem if there’s no allowance going forward. I don’t want to upset him or make him uncomfortable, but I don’t know how to bring it up smoothly, so I’m asking for advice.

I’m Saito, a columnist ♪ Try following Date◎Yume’s advice, and also report the matter to the club. I’m sure there are others who have experienced the same thing.

I’m Maezawa from the President’s Office, and I’ll answer as well. > But I’d be in trouble if he stops giving me an allowance from now on. I think this man originally intended to continue seeing you without an allowance. There have been men like that before, so he may be one of them. The club has warned him several times, but perhaps for that reason, he properly paid the allowance until the fourth meeting, before the two of you reached an agreement. This time, when he said, “Let’s be more like lovers next time,” I think he meant that he wanted to continue without an allowance. Even though you misunderstood him, he probably believes that you agreed. Since I think his intention was to see you without paying an allowance, bringing up the allowance now may simply end the relationship. Still, I don’t think there’s any point in continuing to see him without an allowance, so you should clearly communicate that to him. You could first send something like: “I forgot to receive my allowance last time. Would it be possible for you to give me the allowance for that meeting?” If he replies: “I thought you agreed when I said we should be more like lovers. Couples don’t exchange money, do they?” You could say: “After we were intimate last time, I didn’t receive an allowance, and I felt empty, wondering what I was doing. You never told me there wouldn’t be an allowance—I thought you meant we would simply get closer and be intimate like a couple. I didn’t agree to seeing you without an allowance. Would it really not be possible for you to pay me?” If he still refuses to pay, please report the details to the club as feedback. We can’t collect the money on your behalf, but we can at least warn him. If he has already been warned before, he may be told that this is his final chance. If he has already used up his chances, he may be forcibly removed from the club. Also, if you give him a -2 in every feedback category, it will affect his rating. If you give positive points for things like cleanliness, his overall rating may not become negative. The trick is to score him so that his overall rating is negative. The club doesn’t calculate the totals for each individual category. Only the overall score across all categories affects the man, so please keep that in mind when rating him.

I’m Aya, a female member. Still, if you really feel you have to bring it up, you could try saying something like, “I completely forgot to ask for transportation money last time~ (>_<) Oops!” If he pretends not to know what you mean, just quietly say goodbye.

I’m in Seattle. Is he a handsome guy in his 30s? If not, he’s just a person to avoid. Chalk it up to bad luck and move on. There’s no point meeting him again—it would just be a waste of time. Leave feedback and block him.

I’m Dai, a male member. That man knew exactly what he was doing. What he meant was, “You don’t have a money-based relationship with a girlfriend, right?” The mistake was not confirming the terms. Because you didn’t ask for the allowance, he mistakenly assumed he’d found a woman he could date without paying one.

I’m Ayase Nana ♡ Maybe he simply overlooked it? The part about “like lovers” does make me uneasy. Once you agree to meeting without an allowance, I think he’ll expect the next one to be without one too. What are you going to do? I’d hate for him to get angry if you told him you’d be uncomfortable without an allowance. How about messaging him: “I wasn’t expecting this meeting to be without an allowance, and that would be difficult for me, so I’d like this to be our last time”? A phone call might resolve things more easily, but with LINE, the message could be taken the wrong way, and I’d hate for him to get really angry. If it were me, I’d handle it by phone. Think through a few possible responses first, then give him a call.

I’m Osaka, a male member. Even if it was accidental, it’s something they really shouldn’t have done, so I can understand why you feel disappointed. Try telling them honestly how you feel. I think contacting them on LINE would be fine too. If they’re the kind of person who takes advantage whenever they get the chance, that must be difficult for you. In that case, you could report them to UC and decline the arrangement yourself. Even though we’re the same gender, it makes me want to tell them to get their act together. Seriously.

I’m Date◎Yume, a male member. Since relationships through a dating club are based on receiving an allowance, I’d suggest contacting him and saying: “Since I didn’t receive the allowance last time, please include it with the allowance for our next meeting.” You should also report only the facts to the club: “I didn’t receive the allowance for the second meeting.” He may not respond, and there’s a very high possibility that this was deliberate.

I’m Kazu, a male member. I think that man got the wrong impression that you were willing to accept no allowance. Going without an allowance isn’t something to take lightly. I think all you can do is say, “I didn’t receive my allowance last time.”