After dinner with someone I met for the second time, she hinted that she wanted a bag costing around ¥60,000. Is this kind of thing common at dating clubs?
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She was Type B, so the first time we just had dinner and went for a walk, and I was told that for monthly support, she’d be happy if it could cover roughly what she had lost in part-time wages due to COVID. Around ¥50,000–¥60,000, I believe.
Since she was bright and cute, I told her that if we could meet regularly, I’d be willing to give her more than that.
The second time, she said she wanted to look at some bags after dinner, so I went with her. When we reached a luxury-brand bag costing around ¥60,000, she switched into hinting mode, saying, “I kind of want this…” She asked the store clerk various questions and tried holding it, so I understood that she wanted me to buy it for her—but I decided to let it go.
I might understand if we had met many times and built up some trust, but personally, I feel it would be more beneficial in the long run to simply continue supporting her regularly.
Or was she planning to have me buy an expensive item and then cut ties?
I’d appreciate your thoughts, including from a woman’s perspective.
I’m Dai, a male member.
I once went on dates with a woman who was exactly like that.
The first date was dinner, and the second was an adult relationship. While we were discussing a third date on LINE, she said she wanted a Christmas present.
I had told her beforehand that I didn’t like designer brands, but she still asked me for one, so I ended things.
I remember thinking the club had an excellent read on her, since they had described her beforehand as “a woman who has unrealistic dreams about papa-katsu.”
There seem to be a certain number of women like this, so if you’re a Platinum member or above, asking the club whether she’s overly focused on money might help you avoid them.
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I’m Aya, a female member.
I’ve genuinely never made those kinds of requests. I’ve always been uncomfortable having even my boyfriend buy me things, so I think it’s just part of my personality. Of course, I do think that receiving support over the long term would mean a larger total amount, but more than anything, I simply don’t like asking for things.
She probably does it because it has worked for her before. If your gut told you that you didn’t like it, I don’t think you’ll be compatible going forward.
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I’m Saito, a column writer♪
① It wouldn’t be worth it unless I received more allowance or something similar.
② This male member thinks, “I might be able to get somewhere with her.”
I think it’s one of those two.
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It’s Nana Ayase ♡
Um… why do you end up choosing someone based on looks alone?
Please let the staff know via LINE. I was pressured into going shopping on the second meeting. To make sure no other gentlemen fall victim, let’s call her the “Brand-Buying Yokai.”
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Maezawa from the CEO’s Office here.
> Around ¥50,000–¥60,000.
> She was bright and cute, so I told her I’d be willing to give her more if we could meet regularly.
Isn’t that the reason?
You said you were willing to give her more than ¥50,000–¥60,000.
You may have meant around ¥60,000–¥70,000, but to her, it probably sounded like she could receive over ¥100,000.
If so, she may have been expecting you to buy her a bag worth around ¥60,000, plus give her an allowance of about ¥50,000.
So I think you may have overpromised a little.
The woman also probably shouldn’t have taken your words so literally, but if she’s young, it’s understandable that she would.
You should have enough leeway to simply think, “What a cute girl.” In fact, she seems like a nice, trusting person.
That said, I’d be concerned about buying it for her outright, so I think it would be better to wait until after you go to the hotel.
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I think you handled it the best you could.
The other day, a younger girl at work told me about something called “receiving girls.”
Isn’t that kind of similar?
They don’t like the guy or intend to date him—they just get him to buy them whatever they want.
I heard this story from a business owner I know. After dinner with a rather carefree single mother, she said she had something to take care of and stopped by a store selling ○んクレ. While chatting with the staff at the register, saying things like, “Aww, that’s so cute,” she suddenly went, “Oh, the one I ordered has arrived! Oh, my birthday is coming up… I really want this, I really do…”
Apparently, she ended up making him pay over ¥300,000.
That business owner said he couldn’t bring himself to say no because of his stupid pride. Everyone in his circle knows about it, but that woman has already latched onto another nearby ○理士 and is getting him to buy her all kinds of things.
I’m glad you didn’t get caught up with someone like that.
There are plenty of cute girls who also know their limits.
On to the next one.
Akari
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
I got the impression that she simply doesn’t know how to interact with people. In short, I think she’s just a little clueless.
Personally, if she asked to see my bag after dinner, I’d say, “Huh? What do you mean?”
P.S. I don’t think this is something that happens often. I’ve never had an experience like that myself.
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I’m Tetsu, a male member.
This is just my personal take, but I’d find it pretty presumptuous after only meeting twice. I don’t trust people—regardless of gender—whose words don’t match their actions, so if it were me, I’d end things in this situation.
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It’s Seattle.
If she has no intention of seeing you a third time, then she’s either a pro trying to squeeze as much out of you as possible, or an amateur who doesn’t know how to build an ongoing arrangement.
Add the cost of the bag to the cash allowance when you run the numbers.
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