Aren’t women who say, “I’ll leave the allowance up to you,” often people to avoid?

I’m Aya, a female member. I’m not the type to say, “I’ll leave it up to you,” or name an amount I want. With the men I’ve met so far, I’ve simply accepted whatever they offered. I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone who refused to pay just because I didn’t ask for anything, and I certainly don’t try to squeeze men for as much money as possible, so I don’t think I’m a person to avoid… Perhaps the amount you’re offering doesn’t match your appearance or the level of effort required from the woman.

I’m Date◎Yume, a male member. That was truly the kind of encounter you’d expect from a dating club. I think the woman weighed her options—something men do all the time. I think her actions were admirable. She seems like a woman who approaches this on her own terms and has strong confidence in herself.

Maezawa from the CEO’s office here as well. > If you have a standard amount in mind, why not just tell us instead of trying to test us? That’s rich coming from you. When a woman states the allowance she wants, some men say things like: “It’s too much.” “What makes you worth that much?” “Do you have any idea how hard it is to earn that kind of money?” Even though she only answered because she was asked, she may still get treated terribly. Thankfully, that’s limited to a few cheap men. And if she says something like, “I’d like a little more,” some men immediately complain that she’s too focused on money. What kind of delusion is that? That’s why women use self-protective measures such as not stating their desired amount, and deciding not to meet again if the other person’s offer is lower than what they had in mind. > Do they really want to take money home no matter what? Why didn’t you tell her your desired amount beforehand? If you had, you both could have parted ways right there. Instead, you kept quiet until the end and then paid her a low allowance afterward. That’s absolutely despicable. The woman only couldn’t complain because she had said she would leave it up to you. Look at it this way: a woman of such refined standing—someone you normally wouldn’t have been able to become intimate with—agreed to see you. You should be grateful. Say “thank you” more than a hundred times, and mean it. At least she didn’t turn you down after you paid the setting fee. She’s a good woman. Still, the reason she rejected you was perfectly clear, yet you weren’t even willing to pay the same amount as other men. What exactly is that supposed to mean? The fact that your terms didn’t match simply means you lacked the means to provide. Why not try earning more so this doesn’t happen again?

I’m a male member, “Paper Airplane.” Perhaps she, in turn, saw you as a person to avoid. Let’s not blame the other person.

I’m Column Writer Flagmaker. I don’t think it’s just about the amount—it’s probably an overall evaluation. My guess is that the questioner simply didn’t live up to the allowance amount they themselves had decided on. If someone told me, “I’ll leave it up to you,” I’d immediately think, “Ah, this is one of those situations where I’m being tested.” So, as a bit of a nervous person, I’d offer a reasonable allowance slightly above the standard and keep things comfortable and low-key, with the goal of making it to a second meeting.

I’m in Seattle. She’s probably the kind of woman who gets flooded with offers, so she cuts men off if they’re too broke to quietly offer 10—and because negotiating with them is a hassle, dealing with a lot of them would be too much trouble. In a way, she may simply be practical. Be grateful that she gave you one chance, and move on to the next one.

I’m Kazu, a male member. I have to disagree. When I’m told, “I’ll leave it up to you,” I ask, “In that case, how about ○?” and only go to the room after we’ve agreed, so I’ve never had that experience. Since she hasn’t undressed yet on the first meeting, she can’t know whether the allowance is worth it. So perhaps she decides overall whether she wants to continue seeing him only after spending some time with him.