I’m the male member who asked this question.

I’m だて◎ゆめ, a male member. If that’s what you mean, I understand that feeling. Relationships through a dating club are essentially a kind of contract, so I think that’s a valid way to look at it. People have different views on reducing the allowance, but in my case, I believe a reduction is unavoidable. My attitude is that if she ends things over it, I can simply move on to the next person. That’s where I differ a little from typical men in relationships—and from you, the person asking the question. I haven’t made any major reductions, though, and we’re still continuing the arrangement.

I’m Maezawa from the President’s Office, and I’ll answer this too. > I’ve communicated these two points. If that’s the case, I think you may have different definitions of what “a lot of kissing” means. For example, a woman who normally doesn’t kiss might consider kissing a man twice to be “a lot.” Or she may think she’s kissing plenty simply by being willing to respond to his kisses as many times as he likes, even if she doesn’t initiate any herself. If you gently explain that sort of thing to her, I think your understanding will gradually become more aligned. Also, saying “like a couple inside the room” may be difficult to understand unless you clearly explain what that means in concrete terms. Something like, “It would be nice if we acted more like a couple this way,” can mean different things to different people. > If I give her more, then, since I’m only human, I can ask her for things. The reason for giving more is to prevent a situation where you like her, but she ends up feeling dissatisfied. I think it’s a little different from giving her more in exchange for being able to ask for things. That said, in the end, if you give her more, you may feel willing to accommodate her to some extent because you want to do something for her. So rather than thinking, “I gave her more, so I can ask for things,” the real goal should be: “I gave her more, and as a result, we were able to have the kind of relationship I hoped for.” Since you’re already in an advantageous position, I think it would be best to gently—very gently—explain what kind of woman and relationship you’re hoping for. And if you think of it as a kind of role-play, you may be less disappointed. Something like training? Maybe?

I’m Ayase Nana ♡ If she says 5, why not just give her 5 without increasing it? It’s better not to expect too much from women. I don’t think you’ll find someone who can meet every expectation you have. You know what they say—everyone is different. How about giving her the amount she initially asked for, and increasing it if things go well? I don’t think many people will agree to do something just because you offer them more money. Alternatively, you could make offers to women one after another—you might find someone who fits. Good luck!

I’m Tetsu, a male member. I agree with Kazu.

I’m Kazu, a male member. Thinking you can get special treatment by offering a big tip is exactly like buying services with money at a brothel.

I’m Taro, a male member. Since you want to try more elaborate things, I think you just need to communicate that clearly. You’ve already mentioned it once, so she probably understands that you have that preference, but perhaps she hasn’t realized that it’s essential to you and something you consider very important. You’re not talking about anything particularly extreme—it sounds fairly mild at first glance—so it may simply not have made much of an impression. The way you’re offering the money isn’t ideal either. You’re probably treating the money as payment for the activities, and assuming that since you’re giving her extra, she should naturally provide additional services. That doesn’t seem to be getting across to her. It would be clearer to pay the amount she requested, then tell her you’ll give her extra if she does things the way you prefer. It does create a bit of a “training an animal to perform tricks” vibe, though（笑）. If you want to treat her like a person（笑）, paying in advance is fine too, but you should make the meaning behind it clear. And if what she does turns out to be different from what you had in mind, just tell her so. Rather than bringing it up casually in the moment, give her explicit feedback—something like, “Okay, can we have a little debrief?” It’s not that she’s doing anything wrong; your preferences are just difficult to understand. That’s pretty common for people with unusual tastes, so don’t worry about it—just communicate frankly. And don’t make the girl cry.

I’m Paper Airplane, a male member. Don’t those two things just happen naturally, depending on the mood of the moment? If the atmosphere is exciting enough, things will happen naturally without you even having to ask… > I sometimes wonder whether it’s better to simply give her the amount she wants and keep things like a host-club arrangement. At the same time, I want to give her a little more, and if I do give her more, I’m only human, so I find myself expecting her to follow through on what she agreed to when I asked. With that way of thinking, she may feel that you believe “you can get anything as long as you pay.” When club women come to me for advice, that’s the complaint I hear most often. Many also say it’s exhausting and that they have to be constantly careful around men like that. Some women may even want to meet a man who makes things easy and enjoyable, without receiving any allowance. She may be meeting another papa in a fun, relaxed way for almost no allowance at all compared with what she receives from you. You might even have become a topic of conversation between them. This isn’t a host-club service, so you shouldn’t attach conditions or think in terms of what you’ll get in return. If you’re going to think about anything, think about what you can do to make her genuinely want to do those things herself. “I paid, so…” That is the attitude women dislike the most. And that applies not only to women… Also, papa-katsu is meant to be something both people enjoy actively and enthusiastically, just as the name suggests. You should genuinely enjoy doing everything you can to make her happy. If you focus completely on making her enjoy herself, those two things should naturally progress more than enough. Because you’re giving her an allowance, I believe the man should take the initiative to make things comfortable and enjoyable for her. Otherwise, the person receiving the money ends up feeling extremely pressured.