This is going to be a long post.
I met a papa (a male supporter), and although we had only met three times, I had heard that he worked in a specialized field and that things would be extremely busy for a while whenever he took on a new job.
However, he updated Twitter every morning and evening and was usually diligent about replying to comments.
He kept posting and replying properly during that time as well.
So I felt that I should make sure to stay in touch, and I sent him DMs on Twitter and occasionally messaged him on LINE too.
Most of my messages were just “Good morning” or “Hope you’re doing well.”
Every once in a while, I’d ask something like, “I wonder when we can meet next?” That was about the extent of it.
But little by little, he stopped replying, and eventually he started leaving my LINE messages on read. When I asked if I had done something to upset him, he said that the pressure of having to meet when he was busy was difficult for him. Then he blocked me on both Twitter and LINE.
I’m so shocked and hurt that I can’t get over it.
All three times we met, we genuinely had a wonderful time together.
I didn’t know things like this could happen.
Now I’m scared to meet another papa in the future.
I’m Aya, a female member.
I think about how much the other person likes me, and I only contact men who seem genuinely interested in me. Men don’t gradually develop feelings for a woman, so if it’s not going to work, I believe nothing you do will change that.
In your case, it sounds like you simply didn’t click with that man. Why not find a papa (a male supporter) who will like you more?
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I’m Ayase Nana ♡
First of all, you were messaging him on both LINE and Twitter, right?
Stick to LINE and ask him how often he’d like you to message him.
Since he has a family, there are times when it’s not appropriate for him to receive LINE messages, right?
Make sure to ask him first.
Just don’t send LINE messages or tweets whenever you feel like it. Simply do that from now on.
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I’m Paper Airplane, a male member.
> Most of the messages are just “Good morning” and “Take care.”
> Every now and then, it’s “I wonder when we can meet next.” That’s about it.
Translated, the man on the receiving end hears:
“Money.” “Money.” “I wonder when I’ll get money next.”
If it’s only been three meetings, I’d suggest being more cautious from here on out.
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I’m a male member, Chikuwa. This is pretty much how it normally goes when a man tries to win over an ordinary woman. Getting turned down repeatedly, ignored, or talked about behind your back is just part of the deal.
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
I also think that man probably shouldn’t have given her both his LINE and Twitter, but in general, having the same person contact you through multiple channels can feel a little overwhelming.
I think your mistake was pushing too hard. Pay attention to the other person’s reactions and learn to maintain an appropriate distance.
Specifically, when their replies start becoming less frequent, sending even more messages usually only puts pressure on them.
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I can understand why it would be irritating to keep getting LINE messages from someone with plenty of free time when you’re busy with work.
And it sounds like he was a serious-minded person who felt he had to reply whenever a message came in.
The next papa (male supporter) you meet won’t necessarily be anything like that man, so there’s no need to be afraid. Just ask beforehand how often they’d like to exchange LINE messages and try to keep to a comfortable frequency.
Marika
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My name is Shingo Lee (Shingori), and I’m a male member.
It sounds like you’re having a hard time because your means of contacting her was cut off before you had a chance to sort out your feelings.
After spending so much enjoyable time together, I’m sure this must be especially painful right now.
As she explained, the direct reason this time seems to be that she found it difficult to feel pressured to meet when she was busy.
If there was anything you could have done, perhaps it was to leave her alone. People’s priorities differ depending on the person, the timing, and the circumstances. Sometimes, your own priority may drop. That can be difficult even for married couples or romantic partners, so it’s even more complicated in a papa-and-PJ relationship.
You said, “Now I’m afraid to meet another papa,” but I think you may be expecting too much from other people. Papas, romantic partners, and friends are not there simply to keep you company when you’re bored.
Perhaps you just can’t stand it when someone is slow to reply, but to me, it seems that you’re becoming dependent on your papa.
Humans are not good at being alone and can’t live without some form of dependence, but that dependence can be spread out among different people.
I think it would be better for you to avoid feeling lonely by having more papas, making more friends, or finding people to do activities with.
I sincerely hope you can spend your days peacefully, without fear or loneliness.
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