I’m a female member. I like being touched, but most of the time I don’t actually feel much pleasure. I end up faking it, and I want to experience it without pretending. I’d say I have quite a lot of experience. Can the way I stimulate myself improve my sensitivity? Should I buy a proper toy, or do I need to be with more people? lol

I’m Tetsu, a male member. Discovering exactly what feels good for you can sometimes make things complicated. It’s best not to expect anyone else to touch you exactly the way you do— even slight differences in location or pressure can change how it feels. The moment you think, “Hmm… this feels different,” when someone else touches you, the pleasure disappears. I think whether someone can feel pleasure comes down to concentration. In other words, your mind has to be completely occupied with how good it feels. If someone focuses intensely on the spots that feel good and keeps doing that, your attention stays there. But as time passes, you start to have room for other thoughts. That mental space is what leads to “coming back to reality.” If you can fill that space, you should be able to experience a lot more pleasure. The reason unfamiliar situations—like dark rooms, blindfolds, or bondage—can feel good is that you can’t predict what will happen next, leaving no room for other thoughts and allowing you to focus entirely on the pleasure. If you’re putting on an act, you already have room in your mind for other thoughts, so expecting to genuinely enjoy yourself is pretty hopeless. Meeting a man who keeps changing things up and pleasuring you in different ways might solve the problem, but that’s just a matter of luck (lol). If you want to solve it yourself, I think the answer is to find situations that feel good to you, without worrying about the man, and take the lead in the encounter for your own pleasure.

I’m Shigo Lee (Shingori), a male member. Some people have a strong curiosity about sex despite having many encounters, yet still don’t find it pleasurable even when using an electric massager. The idea that you’ll get better simply by gaining more experience, or that sex will improve if you stay with one person longer, is a myth. Improving your sex life requires effort on your part. There’s a lot I could say, but since this is a short Q&A response, I’ll keep it brief. ① Things you can do yourself In general, improving a woman’s sexual sensitivity depends largely on her own efforts. Don’t assume that the men you’re with are simply inexperienced. Men who are good at helping their partners discover what feels good understand how pleasure works and can adjust their approach while observing their partner’s reactions. They’re quite rare. Recently, some people have been saying they became able to reach orgasm by using an adult toy called “Yawaraka Manbou,” and it’s been getting a lot of attention. Because the toy is soft, it can’t stimulate one especially sensitive spot too forcefully. This makes it useful for practicing how to “scoop up” pleasure with your whole body. To enjoy yourself more, practice experiencing pleasure as a broad sensation rather than as a single point. In other words, explore your own body by yourself. Instead of focusing on one spot to create pleasure, close your eyes and practice taking in the sensation as it spreads over a wider area. It’s best to do this after a bath. Better circulation can make pleasure more intense. Warming the sacrum—the bone between your lower back and buttocks—with the shower can also help. The muscles around this bone are connected to the vagina. When practicing, find a private space where no one will disturb you, lie on your back, bend your knees with your feet planted, and do it alone. As much as possible, stimulate the areas around your most sensitive spots. For example, instead of touching your nipples directly, gently stroke the surrounding area. This kind of practice can help improve your sensitivity. ② Things you can ask your partner to do Here are a few things you can ask your partner to do during intimacy that may make a significant difference: ・Turn off the lights ・Use a blindfold ・Stimulate less obvious areas ・Tease you ・Turn off the lights/use a blindfold These can help you become fully immersed in sex and focus on the sensations in your body. Many men prefer to keep the lights on, but try asking for one of these two things. Some hotels provide blindfolds, but many don’t, so it may be worth buying one yourself. ・Have them stimulate less obvious areas Many men assume that the only pleasurable areas for women are the ears, neck, nipples, and genitals. Ask them to use their soft tongue on your back, or try areas such as your ribs—especially the lowest rib. Some people also find their armpits pleasurable, so give that a try as well. ・Have them tease you As mentioned earlier, have them thoroughly tease you—for example, by licking around your nipples without touching them directly. While you’re being teased, you anticipate how good it will feel when your nipples are finally licked. That anticipation can amplify the pleasure. ※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※※ These are just the basics of my methods for exploring your own body, limited to points I could explain in a short post. If you have any other questions, please submit them to the Q&A box again.

I’m Taro, a male member. You should try to genuinely fall for one person. I don’t think it’s about how many people you’ve been with, but about the depth and intensity of the experience. When you truly like someone, even touching them warms your heart. You naturally find yourself wanting more contact, moving closer until you’re making as much physical contact as possible. Even while touching each other, it isn’t about moving like something out of an adult video—it becomes an intimate time spent sensing even the slightest differences and exploring what feels best for both of you. The pleasure can last well into the following afternoon. I hope you meet someone like that. You may not find them without meeting a number of people, but more experience doesn’t necessarily make things better. If anything, women who are used to going through the motions with lots of people can seem rather shallow.

I’m a male member, Paper Airplane. If you’re experienced, then perhaps that’s simply the kind of person you are. The question is whether you’ll stay that way forever, or whether things will develop to a certain extent over the years. If you like being touched, though, I feel that the best thing to do might be to stop pretending. The moment you start pretending, the man may lose his enthusiasm—while continuing anyway and hiding it behind an act. If that happens, there’s a risk you may never open up in the future.

I’m Kazu, a male member. Even if you have a lot of casual sex, I don’t think it necessarily means you’ll have a good time. If you often don’t enjoy it, that also means there must be times when you do, right? By figuring out what feels good to you and exploring that further, you may find what works for you. By masturbating, you can take your time alone and figure out what feels good to you.