Hi. I’ve been told here that 30,000 yen is the lower end for an allowance. Would it be rude to ask the papa I’m currently seeing to raise it from 30,000 to 50,000 yen? Should I wait and ask that of the next person who makes me an offer instead?

I’m Date◎Yume, a male member. I’m voting for Kamihikōki! This is a very difficult question to answer. I think Kamihikōki’s response is particularly insightful. Ladies, I hope you’ll read it several times and take the time to understand its main point. To put the answer simply: “Would it be rude to ask for three to be raised to five?” No, it wouldn’t be rude. If you believe that’s what it should be, you should negotiate proactively.

Universe Club staff member Akai here as well. Regarding the allowance, I think it’s extremely difficult to change the amount partway through. This also comes down to personal chemistry, and changing it could make some people feel that the chemistry is no longer right and decide to move on. That’s why I recommend thoroughly discussing this from the start and making sure you’re both on the same page.

I’m a male club member, “Paper Airplane.” I think you need to consider what you’re really looking for: Do you want to have a good papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) experience, with earning money as the priority? Or are you looking for a meaningful relationship? Outside of clubs, 30,000 yen is already quite a generous amount. In an ordinary dating situation, most women would be very happy with it. Personally, I haven’t continued any relationship long-term with women who brought up or asked about the amount, stated their expectations, or tried to negotiate—even when I was offering to increase the allowance. Since what men and women are looking for can be completely opposite, I hope you’ll carefully consider what you truly want and make your decision accordingly if you’re seeking a good papa-katsu relationship.

I’ll answer as Maezawa from the CEO’s office as well. You should assume that raising your allowance partway through an arrangement is almost impossible. For example, even in ordinary business, if you start a deal at ¥30,000 and then ask for ¥50,000 from the next transaction onward, the deal will often end. That’s why people only bring up such a request when there’s a truly compelling reason. In fact, in business, it’s more common for people to demand that the price be gradually lowered from the original amount—hence all the talk about large companies bullying subcontractors. This happens because of the imbalance in power between companies, with plenty of other subcontractors available. In your case, even if you take a firm stance, it depends on whether he likes you enough to continue seeing you at ¥50,000. As I said at the beginning, raising the allowance midway through is extremely difficult, so it would probably be safer not to bring it up at all. > Should I ask for ¥50,000 from my next offer instead? Yes, that would be better. Tell the next person you meet that your allowance is ¥50,000. If he says that’s too much, you can simply say goodbye. If he agrees to ¥50,000, then you can proceed with the arrangement. Once you’re seeing several men who pay ¥50,000, the balance of power with the man paying ¥30,000 will finally shift in your favor. At that point, you can ask whether he would be willing to raise it to ¥50,000—and if he refuses, end the arrangement. That seems to be the most common approach.

I’m in Seattle. It’s possible if the man seems really into you. But there’s a chance he may drop you, so ideally, line up a backup before you say it.

I’m Kazu, a male member. It’s not rude, but unless you have a good reason for raising it from 30,000 to 50,000 yen, she’ll probably turn you down—or, worst case, cut ties with you. If you’re confident she’ll still want to see you even with the allowance increased by 1.7 times, you could ask. Still, I think it would be safer to apply the higher amount starting with your next offer.