I’m a male member. In these arrangements, do men or women usually initiate contact more often?
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I’m seeing four women, and in every case, they were the ones who invited me to meet. Of those, two have been inviting me to meet more and more frequently, and I’m feeling a little overwhelmed. I’m very happy about it, but at the same time, I feel that it may eventually become burdensome for me. I really enjoy the time we spend together, so I’d like to continue having a good relationship with them. I also don’t feel I’m in any position to say that I want to have them all to myself.
Is there any good way to handle these relationships smoothly? I’d appreciate suggestions other than increasing their allowance.
I’m Tetsu, a male member.
What exactly are you worried about? Are you trying to say you’re having trouble because you’re too popular?
If the shorter intervals are becoming a problem, just give some reasonable excuse—like being busy with work—and space things out in a way that works for you.
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In general, my schedule is harder to work around, while the men tend to be more flexible, so I’m usually the one who suggests a date, like, “How about this day?”
For those I see about once a month, some of us set the next date when we meet—for example, “See you again on the first Friday of next month.”
Marika
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Maezawa from the CEO’s office here.
> I’m feeling confused because two of them have been inviting me out more and more frequently.
You can simply schedule things by saying, “I’m pretty busy this week, so how about [date] next week at [place]?”
I’m not really sure what there is to be confused about.
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This is Umino from the Tokyo branch.
Seeing four women—that’s impressive...
Wouldn’t it be best to discuss your schedule with them?
If you’re having trouble deciding how often to meet, I think the best way to create the kind of relationships you want is to coordinate dates with each woman based on how often you’d like to see her.
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I’m a male member, Paper Airplane.
If you say you’re busy for one reason or another, I think you can adjust how often you meet.
Do you want to see all four at about the same frequency? Or is there a favorite among them?
That will affect how often you meet.
Also, if you don’t increase the frequency, there are things you won’t notice or understand—and sometimes you may discover a new kind of compatibility from there…
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
Like you, I generally let the woman take the initiative and invite me. If it starts becoming a burden, I think it’s fine to tell her you’d prefer to schedule it a little further out and adjust accordingly.
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