A male member invited me to go for a drive, but I’m anxious because I don’t know the details.
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It would be a drive before dinner, but if I ask where we’re going or how long it’ll take, is he likely to lose interest?
I’ve never ridden in this man’s car before. It’s just a regular Japanese car, by the way. He’s a low-paying papa (a male supporter), so I don’t think he’s inviting me because he wants to show off his car.
I’m BB7, a male member.
I was simply puzzled to learn that there are men who invite women out for a drive without saying where they’re going.
I was even more surprised—though I hate to say it—that some women worry asking “Where are we going?” might turn the man off.
“Let’s go for a drive.”
“Huh? Where are we going?”
Isn’t that just a perfectly ordinary, everyday conversation?
I often find myself wondering this when I read questions on this site: Do people really have to be that careful with each other just to have a normal conversation?
That’s almost the question I want to ask.
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I’m Aya, a female member.
It sounds like what’s making you uneasy is not knowing the details, so just ask honestly, “Where are we going?” You should be able to estimate how long it’ll take based on the distance. I don’t think that would turn him off.
Personally, I enjoy driving with someone I like. Since you’re both facing forward, it’s easy to talk—almost like sitting at a bar—and the changing scenery keeps things from feeling cramped. So I get excited about going for a drive with a papa who’s a good match.
Are you in the Kanto area? If you’re starting from central Tokyo, I personally like taking a roughly 30-minute drive to LAUMELIA, a café attached to Mercedes-Benz in Urayasu. It has an open, airy terrace seating area.
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I’m Paper Airplane, a male member.
A drive means going somewhere, so the whole point is to go somewhere the woman wants to visit or would enjoy.
But he isn’t even asking you that, right...?
If you’re already missing that kind of communication, there’s a high chance that going forward, your wishes won’t be properly met in other areas either—meals, where you go, what happens in bed, the allowance, everything. It sounds like things will continue along those lines, so it may be best to end things.
Especially if it’s your first drive, he should be asking things like, “Where should we go?” “Would you like to go here?” or “Is this okay?”
No, actually, even before that—and regardless of the drive itself—if he can’t make you feel excited and look forward to the date, making you worry like this is already a deal-breaker.
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Maezawa from the CEO’s office here as well.
Hmm, since it’s your first time getting in his car, I think it would be fine to ask casually.
The main thing you’re concerned about is probably what time you’ll be wrapping things up, right? It can be hard to phrase, but you could say something like:
“I need to be home about five hours after our meeting time. Would that be okay?”
He might ask, “Do you have plans after the date?” but I think there’s a big advantage to confirming the end time in advance.
P.S. I wondered where “LAUMELIA” was, and it turns out it’s near Oedo Onsen Monogatari Urayasu Mangekyo. It’s also close to TDR.
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I’m in Seattle.
Well, at worst, men from the club have had their identities verified, so you won’t be kidnapped or anything. Why not take the plunge and go once? If he does anything strange, just cut him off if he’s low-paying.
By the way, Don Juan’s wife was arrested earlier. If I were killed with drugs, it probably wouldn’t be painful—what an enviable way to go. I’d like to be killed by a papa-katsu woman myself, 30 years from now.
https://www3.nhk.or.jp/news/html/20210428/k10013002181000.html
P.S.
It seems preferable to dying in a traffic accident. Maybe when I’m around 70, I’ll make sure to write a proper will.
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