I have a question. I’ve been seeing a woman on a monthly arrangement for less than six months, but many of our exchanges have made me feel that she’s a little too fixated on money. After communicating with her for a while, I realized that we weren’t a good fit, so I told her by LINE that I’d like to end our arrangement this month. (I wasn’t sure whether to tell her in person, but ultimately chose LINE.)
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She replied that she had been counting on next month’s allowance and asked if she could receive just next month’s payment. In this situation, what would you do?
I’m Taro, a male member.
You can’t put that out there. Cut it out completely. That’s the message you want to get across, right?
Unrelated, but why did another respondent bring up “Pierre and Catherine” here??? It was funny, though, lol. Have you seen the video of that old guy singing it at karaoke? He’s way too good, lol.
Oh, sorry for going off-topic, questioner. Wishing you the best of luck.
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I’m Tetsu, a male member.
You’ve already reached your own conclusion, haven’t you? If you’ve decided to end it, then ending it is the only option.
You dislike how fixated she is on money, and even her final comments were focused on money. If I were in your shoes, I’d end things without doing anything further.
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Maezawa from the CEO’s Office here.
Normally, contracts are often structured with advance notice because it would be problematic if they were terminated unexpectedly.
For example, office leases often require six months’ notice, while agreements with individuals or employment contracts commonly require one month’s notice. So in Japan, I get the impression that giving one month’s notice is the general practice when ending most contracts.
With that in mind, even in a relationship with a woman, I think giving one month’s notice—despite there being no written contract—is important out of consideration for the other person.
Since she only wants next month’s allowance, I think you should give it to her.
It might be better to do so in person over a date, but since you didn’t offer on your own to pay for next month, I feel that could make things awkward.
In that case, it may be best to simply give her one month’s allowance without meeting her. It might feel strange to give her only the allowance, but you could frame it as a thank-you for the time she’s spent with you and give it to her anyway.
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This is Uehara from the staff.
If they’re someone you’d be willing to give it to, I think it’s fine to continue the arrangement with them…
There’s also a possibility they may ask again next month or later, giving you some reason or another.
If you’re thinking of ending things for good after this month, I feel that’s perfectly fine too.
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I’m Kazu, a sleazy old-school male member from the Showa era.
I can sing “Pierre and Catherine” without looking at the lyrics.
If I enjoyed spending time with her—in other words, if I didn’t have any major complaints besides the money-focused nature of our interactions—I’d extend it for another month.
Of course, that’s assuming I hadn’t found someone else to date.
P.S.
When extending the arrangement, I’d probably also try to negotiate some terms in my favor that don’t involve money.
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