A married man I’ve met several times complains to me every time about his lack of intimacy at home and about his wife. After that, he lectures me, saying things like, “You should get married soon, too.”
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As long as I pretend to listen, he seems satisfied, so that part doesn’t really bother me. But what kind of mindset allows someone to complain about his wife and then tell me I should get married?
I reply, “Yeah, I guess so,” but honestly, I’m thinking, “After carrying on something that’s practically an affair and making me listen to all that, there’s no way I’d feel like getting married.”
For those of you who are married, do you ever complain about your wives to other women?
No matter how dissatisfied you are, do you still think people should get married?
I’m Aya, a female member.
He’s certainly an interesting man…
Normally, after complaining, you’d expect him to follow up with, “Marriage isn’t worth it,” but he says, “You should get married,” instead.
Maybe he’s just blurting out whatever comes to mind without thinking, driven by emotion.
I don’t have any desire to get married, so conversations like that don’t come up much for me. But some men do tell me I should have children.
So I say, “I want to have your child, ●●,” and they’re happy to hear that, so I do.
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I’m Paper Airplane, a male member.
I hardly ever complain. I do write about it here, though… My wife’s comments are so funny that I forget them in an instant, so I write them down whenever I actually remember them.
In my private life, I have several long-term girlfriends.
The single ones freely make my wife out to be the villain, embellishing the story as much as they like, and proudly celebrate always having the upper hand.
The married ones seem to realize what a wonderful wife she is even from the little I mention about her, and whenever they get the chance, they praise me for having married such a great woman.
The truth is, I’m happy when I’m with my wife, and I’m happy when I’m with my girlfriends too…
Wait a minute—does that mean women are ultimately an oasis, a place to relax and recharge?
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I’m in Seattle.
If I hadn’t been divorced yet, I probably would’ve complained about it a lot too.
You’re better off not getting married. I don’t think I’ll ever remarry. Being single is fun.
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
I don’t want to be subjected to complaining or pushy lectures, so I make a point of not doing that myself. I try to only share my opinion when someone asks me for advice, like, “What do you think I should do?”
The only complaints I sometimes find interesting to listen to are about offers they received through the dating club. Even then, there are times when a woman gets so frustrated that she starts crying. When that happens, the mood for sex is gone, so we just talk and then part ways. (lol)
I guess I’m the type of self-centered man who needs someone to listen to him so he can process things.
Thinking that people should get married is a very Showa-era value. Since you were born during the Showa era, I suppose it can’t be helped.
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Maezawa from the CEO’s office here as well.
Thank you for your question.
You’re a kind person who listens to the frustrations he can’t share with anyone else. That’s who you are to him.
That may be why he wants to be with you. Perhaps your relationship has gone beyond that of ordinary lovers.
Since you’ve become someone he can truly open up to, you could either put up with it to some extent—or simply tell him you don’t like it. I feel like he may stop venting to you from next time onward.
Personally, I think a relationship on the level of lovers, rather than something beyond that, would be just right…
Though I don’t really understand why he brought up marriage afterward.
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