I’m the person who asked this question the other day. It was about my papa (a male supporter) “cheating” on me with another girl. (My papa uses that word too, so although I’m not his primary wife, I’ll use it as well.) https:\/\/universe-club.jp\/help\/questions\/view\/6018

I didn’t really understand my papa’s feelings and asked for help, but I think I’m starting to understand. Thank you very much! Of course, I can’t know for sure, but I think the point everyone seemed to agree on was that my papa sees me as his main partner and doesn’t want to break up with me, but after a few months, things will settle down and he’ll cheat again. (I’m sorry if I misunderstood.) With that in mind, I’m sorry, but I still have some questions. I’ve been staying with this papa for three nights since yesterday, and when the subject of cheating came up, he said the following: “You tell me, ‘Don’t cheat on me,’ but you don’t really feel that way, do you? You’re just getting intoxicated by yourself saying, ‘Don’t cheat on me,’ even though you don’t actually care which woman I spend time with, lol. Deep down, you’re supposed to be thinking rationally and treating this as a transactional relationship. If you found out I was cheating, you’d just say, ‘Oh, I see. Then goodbye,’ and leave me, right?” I told him, “That’s not true! I don’t want you to cheat on me!” but he wouldn’t budge, saying, “I know you.” I really don’t understand what he means by this. The first time he cheated on me, I was genuinely shocked and ended up crying. And yet my papa says, “You’re the rational type who doesn’t care about cheating.” Why would he think that…? Maybe it’s because when I found out, I said something like, “You can cheat if you want, but don’t bring home any diseases. I really can’t stand that—it’s disgusting. I just don’t care anymore.” But I was just blurting it all out emotionally, and I don’t think I was being rational at all. Aside from that, I never hold back when it comes to showing my affection for him, and I really do like him very much. My papa is popular with women. Since he was young, he’s had girlfriends in addition to his primary wife, and even while dating those girlfriends, he would spend one night with hostesses. He talks about it like it’s a glorious war story, so I know about his past, but maybe because my reaction after hearing those stories was rather muted—something like, “That’s impressive…”—he thinks I’m a cold person who doesn’t care about cheating. He jokes, “You must have green blood, lol. You look emotional, but you’re actually incredibly cold, aren’t you? lol” Of course, I’d prefer it if my papa cheated as little as possible. But it’s also true that I’ve cooled off a little since finding out (I still have very strong feelings for him, but I’ve become more rational: “He’s just an ordinary man after all. He wants to sleep with lots of girls. Well, we met through papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), so even if he focuses on me and treats me well, of course he wants to sleep with other girls too. Since I’m receiving such a generous allowance as part of the arrangement, maybe cheating isn’t that big a deal.” Still, basically, cheating doesn’t make me feel good.) If my papa has somehow sensed these feelings, why would that be? I don’t think I’ve shown it in my attitude. If anything, I’ve been trying to reply to his messages and calls more quickly than before, and I’ve been expressing my affection even more… If he has noticed, would he dislike it? Or would he find it convenient that his main partner isn’t making a fuss? I’m very sorry for the long post. I’d be grateful to hear everyone’s opinions again.