Tips
Jul 3, 2020 10:50
8 answers
Other
I’m Saito, a column writer♪
In a way, everyone has their own difficulties. Don’t worry about it.
Other
I’m BB7, a male member.
Even among people with developmental disorders, there are many different traits. These days, there are also people who self-identify as having a developmental disorder without an official diagnosis or disability certificate. Compared with the past, developmental disorders have become so widely recognized that in some cases, ordinary personality traits are being labeled as developmental disorders.
I don’t know how severe your situation is, but if you have an official disability diagnosis and hold a disability certificate, registration itself may be difficult.
If it’s not that severe and you’re able to manage daily and social life, I think it should be possible to participate to some extent.
Some men don’t mind difficulties with communication or conversations not quite clicking, as long as the woman is attractive and has a good figure. Of course, that assumes she is attractive and has a good figure.
However, if you have poor social awareness—for example, you can’t tell when someone is lying, you’re overly honest, or you trust people too easily—you may be more likely to get deceived by bad men, so please be careful.
🏅 あなたの味方
お役に立てれば幸いです。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe staff
Maezawa from the Corporate Planning Office here as well.
Basically, I don’t think someone with a disability certificate would be able to join.
The reason is that neither I nor the staff are doctors, so we wouldn’t really know how to assess the situation. As a result, if someone has a disability certificate, they would end up failing the screening simply because we don’t know enough about it.
Also, although I can’t say for certain, if someone wrote that they had a certain disability classification, I imagine many men would be reluctant to make them an offer.
So, I think the important factor is probably whether or not they have a disability certificate.
That said, even if someone has a developmental disorder, I think they may still be able to join if it’s mild enough that they don’t have a disability certificate.
👨 Male
Universe member
I’m Date ◎ Yume, a male member.
Even people who seem perfectly ordinary are often dealing with something. I don’t know what kind of developmental disorder you have, but you might want to mention it during the interview.
Will the interviewer say, “You’re not the only one—quite a few people are like that,” or will you be rejected?
It might be worth giving it a try.
Other
I’m Rin, a female member.
Developmental disorders encompass a wide range of conditions, so unless you have the kind that’s immediately obvious at a glance, you may still pass the interview and receive offers based on your photos alone.
That said, this is a dating club, so men have the right to choose. As information to help them make that choice, I believe it’s best to list any relevant characteristics—such as surgical scars, tattoos, a history of cosmetic surgery, or being married.
You’ve probably been told the name or category of your diagnosis, so it may be helpful to include that, along with any areas you struggle with.
On the other hand, for your own sake, you should first consider whether you’ve had any dating experience in everyday life.
You should also ask yourself again why you want to join the club and whether you’ll be okay with the possibility of new information or events happening suddenly and one after another.
Most male members are wonderful, gentlemanly people. However, there may also be some who think, “I don’t know much about her, but since she says she has a developmental disorder, I can treat her however I want—maybe I can even get away without giving her an allowance.”
When you receive an offer, please be prepared to judge the situation carefully, assess the person on your first date, and have the courage to say no when necessary.
Since you’re considering knocking on the club’s door for whatever personal reasons you may have, I sincerely hope you meet a good match.
🏅 倶楽部女性のご主人様に潤いを！
Mパパ、永遠の交際継続中！
B1タイプ〜A寄りパパです！
会う度大人は嫌と感じる方………ご相談ください。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe member
I’m Hikōki, a male member.
If you’ve been living a normal social life up to now, I don’t think it should cause any particular problems.
It wouldn’t be an issue for me at all.
If anything, I’d welcome it, since it can lead to deeper communication and an emotional connection between both people.
The fact that both men and women overcome the hurdle of joining a club means they’re undoubtedly seeking some kind of help or healing.
In your case, I think your individuality—including your vulnerabilities—would come across more easily to your partner. The man on the receiving end may also find it easier to understand your feelings, which could very well lead to a natural connection and relationship.
🏅 大阪の昼寝引きこもりトレーダー
スペ90以下のひとを厚く囲い込み、一生面倒見て実質一夫多妻で大切にしたい独身です。
Age: 50s
👨 Male
Universe member
I’m a male member, Seattle.
To be honest, I think you should write it.
Some male members, myself included, are financially comfortable and have plenty of free time, but are starved for excitement.
Being around nothing but wonderful women can get boring, so as unkind as it may sound, some of us may want to help an unconventional woman become better.
Other
I’m Marika, a female member.
First, let me clarify that this is purely my personal opinion.
It depends on the type and severity of the developmental disability, but if you’re able to manage everyday life reasonably well, I don’t think it should be a problem.
You mentioned a communication disorder, but if you can carry on a normal conversation, an arrangement should still be possible. If crowds or being around a lot of people are difficult but one-on-one situations are fine, and you don’t have panic attacks, then I think you should be okay.
If you attend a regular interview and the staff don’t notice anything unusual, there’s a chance you could be accepted.
As for whether to disclose it during the interview, if you do, they would probably have to include it in your profile. In that case, if you were compared with another woman with similar qualities, some men might choose the other woman instead. From a man’s perspective, a sudden problem arising in a discreet arrangement would be troublesome, so they may naturally feel that it’s safer not to get involved with something they don’t fully understand.
That said, I’m sure there are also men who wouldn’t mind at all, so I think it would be worth attending an interview first.