A question from a female member.

Maezawa from Shacho-shitsu here. So it’s not that you don’t want to kiss him—you’re just concerned about his bad breath, right? In that case, if he tries to kiss you before you enter the hotel, you could say something like, “Let’s do that in the room...” and put it off until you get there. Once you’re in the hotel, try saying, “Would it be okay if I brushed my teeth?” If he brushes his teeth too, I’d say he’s the kind of man who genuinely considers his partner’s feelings. A lot of men won’t pick up on the hint, though. So you could be more direct and say something like: “When you’re thinking about the other person, brushing your teeth first is just basic manners, right? I think people who brush their teeth are wonderful.” If he still doesn’t get it, I’m afraid you’ll have no choice but to say, “Would you mind brushing your teeth?” It may make things a little awkward, but if you’re able to become intimate afterward, I think you can smooth over that awkwardness. > Should I tell the man this beforehand? I’m not sure what stage you mean by “beforehand,” but it may be okay to mention it as one of your terms when he invites you to a hotel. That said, normally, I feel it’s better not to say anything until just before.

I’m a confused man in my 60s. Since profiles sometimes ask whether you like sex, I don’t see a problem with mentioning the kinds of kisses you do or don’t like. For me, that’s an important factor when deciding whether to make an offer, so I’d actually prefer to know in advance! That way, neither of us will end up disappointed when the time comes…

I’m a male member, BB7. Once, while we were intimate in a hotel, she refused and said, “I don’t like kissing.” She explained that she didn’t kiss her boyfriend either, so I understood. But if she had said, “I don’t want to kiss you,” or “Your breath stinks,” I probably would have been hurt and left right then. I don’t have bad breath—I’m basically odorless and tasteless—but even as a man, I can’t stand the sewer-like smell of some older guys. When I think about how a woman could kiss a man like that, I feel terribly sorry for her. I’ve also met women with unbelievably bad breath. There was no way I felt like getting intimate with them. I assume they had untreated cavities. Whether it’s brushing your teeth to prevent bad breath, treating cavities, or watching what you eat to maintain a healthy gut, both men and women should take care of these things for each other.

I’m Saito, a columnist♪ If you keep putting up with it, the relationship probably won’t last, so I think it’s better to be upfront. You don’t have to directly say, “You have bad breath.” Simply offering him breath-freshening gum from time to time will usually help a man get the hint. There are all kinds of men out there, so don’t force yourself to keep seeing someone. I sincerely hope you meet someone you’re truly compatible with.