To the man who wrote, “I want to understand, even just a little, because believing this isn’t sex work seems important to women—a line they want to maintain while doing this.”

I’m a lost man in my 60s. Whether it’s in the adult entertainment industry or not, I naturally want to treat women with respect… (^◇^;) Ladies, please don’t hesitate to exercise your right to refuse when a man makes you think, “What is this guy’s problem?” That’s your basic right—especially outside the adult entertainment industry… She was a woman who had been blacklisted. Apparently, the man told her, “I upgraded for you and came all the way out here, so dinner would just be a waste of time. Let’s get to the room already!” She felt he was going to treat her roughly, so she exercised her right to refuse. After that, things got even worse. He kept berating her, saying, “Do you even realize how much money I’ve spent on you?” She said that, after encountering several men like that, she had already completed the withdrawal process by the time she met me… (・・?) Some men seem to put their own convenience and views first—or rather, completely disregard the woman’s feelings—thinking that there’s nothing to complain about as long as money settles everything… I’m saying this as a reminder to myself… lol

I’m Saito, the columnist♪ >Wouldn’t men feel really uncomfortable if a woman thought, “I’m only interested in your money, so I don’t need this tedious dinner. I just want to exchange money for sex and leave as quickly as possible”? → I basically assume that’s how it is, so it doesn’t bother me. These days, I’ve also been having the women dine by themselves more often. They say it’s fun to have dinner alone with a glass of champagne at the Ritz or Aman—it makes them feel like one of those Minato-ku girls. >Also, at adult entertainment establishments, I’ve heard that women sometimes endure rough play or being ejaculated inside without consent because they want repeat bookings or don’t want to be fired, taking advantage of the fact that the customer’s identity is unknown and that he’s the client. That also hurts their dignity. → If anything, I feel that women in dating clubs based on free romance are more likely to silently put up with sexual misconduct. Rules are enforced more strictly in the adult entertainment industry, so those kinds of problems are less common. That may be something only people with experience in that industry can understand. >What women want to believe when they’re in a dating club rather than working in adult entertainment is, “Please respect me as a human being, not as an object.” → Ultimately, the whole point here comes down to how women, men, and the individuals involved choose to perceive it—or perhaps hope to perceive it, haha—as “a dating club rather than adult entertainment.” Maybe it isn’t really something we can argue about. I hope each woman can shine as she works toward her own goals. It’s much easier for me when they see the relationship as simply a necessary arrangement for that purpose. Don’t let the papa (male supporter) you’re seeing hold you back or tie you down—go all out toward your own dreams and goals.