For those of you who have a monthly arrangement, do you have any tips or things you pay attention to in order to keep it going long-term?

Hmm… - Sex feels good (we’re compatible) - It doesn’t get boring - She’s beautiful and has a great figure, yet surprisingly willing to accommodate some spicy requests (a little submissive, maybe?) - Considerate—not too much, not too little - Not overly demanding and happy with the allowance - Easy to coordinate schedules with - Willing to work around my availability Something along those lines, I guess. It’s just papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), but I feel like the arrangements that last are with people who genuinely respect each other as human beings and come to like each other. It probably can’t continue for long unless both people actually like each other… maybe.

I think it comes down to combining these two things: × The papa maintains an appropriate distance from the woman × The woman engages in a kind of pseudo-romance with the papa If either one is missing, it’s difficult to keep the relationship going. Even if the physical chemistry is amazing, if the woman is clearly treating it as purely transactional, she’ll lose out to a girl who tells you she likes you and backs it up with her actions. On the other hand, if you “take the plunge, throw yourself into the papa’s arms, and try pseudo-dating,” only to have him genuinely fall for you and completely lose his sense of boundaries, you’d want to cut ties even if he was a generous (well-paying) papa, right? I provide substantial financial support to two women, and both of them call me their boyfriend and act exactly like real girlfriends. But I always maintain a certain distance, and I’ve never acted like I was their boyfriend. I even support them in finding a boyfriend and getting married. Even when these girls call me their boyfriend, I still think of myself as their papa, not their boyfriend. When I make a new offer, and afterward as well, I keep telling my PJ girls, “Make sure you find another good papa, too.” If they ever say they’re quitting Universe Club, I seriously try to stop them. I do that because I understand that, for women, money is almost as important as life itself. Their happiness comes first, and my own desires come second. I feel that it’s only by showing this through my actions that a woman can truly become serious about me.

To put it bluntly, women who receive a low allowance do tend to make an effort to find something good about the relationship and keep it going. When the allowance is generous, though, they’ll often say goodbye pretty quickly. I figure it’s faster for them to look for someone else. Speaking a little more seriously, one trait I’ve noticed in women who stay around for a long time is that they’re fairly comfortable showing their true selves. Rather than simply adapting to me, they let me sense what they don’t like or what they do like, and when I do those things for them, they look genuinely happy. They may not say it outright, but many of the women I’ve had long-term arrangements with were good at communicating in that way. From the man’s side, I feel that the important thing is not to try too hard. If you actively try to build a certain kind of relationship, it can come across as unnatural and end in failure. Maybe it’s just my personality, but I tend to be pretty assertive, so I think things go better when I hold that back, listen carefully, and try to pick up on what the other person is really saying. On the other hand, sometimes you fall for someone and rush headlong in—and it actually turns out well (though there are no guarantees). I sometimes wonder what I’m doing at my age, but showing your feelings can still strike a chord. I want the men reading this to remember that. Sometimes you have to take the plunge. If you look it up, you’ll see that the survival rate for people who actually jumped from the stage at Kiyomizu-dera is surprisingly high（笑） Taro

If anything, it may depend on whether the papa is someone who can maintain a relationship over the long term. As for the secrets and common traits: The papa makes an offer because he likes the woman’s appearance and other qualities, so he naturally cares about whether she accepts him and genuinely likes him as well. That’s why I don’t think there’s anything wrong with the woman taking the initiative and contacting him more often—whether it’s to chat or suggest dates. Why is that effective? The more often she invites him out, and the more frequently they can meet, the more clearly she conveys how highly she prioritizes him and how much she likes him—especially when she’s willing to adjust her schedule around his. It may also make him feel that she’s losing interest in seeing other papas. The more he feels relied upon, the happier he becomes and the more motivated he is to support her. He’s also less likely to start looking elsewhere. I think all of those things contribute to a relationship continuing. After seeing each other for several years, people gradually begin to show their true selves, and that’s probably when their individual personalities and characteristics really become clear. It takes a considerable number of meetings, but I think an important factor is how quickly both people can sense that the relationship might develop into something lasting. If neither person senses that potential, the relationship probably won’t continue that far. In my case, once a relationship begins and continues for a certain length of time, all of them—including the women I met through the club—end up lasting for years. I don’t get bored with them; if anything, the longer it continues, the more I come to like them and grow attached to them. I feel that the intimate bond deepens until we become people who can’t easily let go of each other. Even if we haven’t seen each other for a long time, if either of us reaches out after a long absence, we’re still able to meet again almost immediately, partly out of concern for each other. It feels like that supportive relationship remains intact. I feel that we’ve reached a relationship where we accept not only each other’s strengths but also our flaws, and come to like and acknowledge the whole person—the good and the bad—as someone who is almost like air: indispensable. Perhaps a big part of it is that I’m not handsome. A handsome man might be assumed to be a womanizer, which could make women think of worries and uncertainties first. Since I’m unattractive but appear serious and dependable, I think women feel reassured when they know I’m focused only on them. For women from the club, that might be a sense of superiority—or perhaps the reassurance and special feeling of knowing they won’t be cut off. What I can say is that when there’s that much special reassurance and trust, the women can behave naturally without worrying about showing their true selves, even though the relationship began through a club. I think that makes the time very meaningful for them. They probably feel relaxed and comforted. Also, I can hardly remember initiating a LINE message or inviting them out over the past several years. Since the women are the ones who invite me to hang out, I think the fact that they actively want to see me is also part of why they enjoy the relationship.

At first, I’m drawn to a girl’s strengths and the qualities that set her apart from the others. But once things have been going on for a while, I start looking for a reason to end it. So I suppose the girls who stay for over a year are the ones I can’t find a reason to cut ties with. The girls who get cut off after a few meetings or two or three months probably have their good points, but just as many drawbacks.

Every now and then, someone asks about the characteristics of an ideal supporter, but I think they’re oversimplifying human relationships far too much. If you’re struggling with something, perhaps one reason is that you view other people and relationships too simplistically—enough to think this is something you should ask. Personally, I try not to put too much burden on the other person, but that isn’t specifically to make the relationship last. It’s simply common sense that applies to relationships in general, not some special secret.