From the club’s perspective, you’re helping increase revenue by leading to more arrangements.
When I meet someone for a meal, I try to find their good qualities and hopefully build a long-term relationship. If we enjoy talking, I may continue seeing them mainly for dinner even if they’re not Type A.
That said, I never go straight to a Type A arrangement from the start.
Personally, I make offers to women whose looks I’m attracted to, so if we also click beyond appearances, my enthusiasm doesn’t fade after just one or two meetings.
On the other hand, if we don’t click, I’ll usually meet her up to twice to make sure. If it still doesn’t feel right, I’ll end the arrangement and make an offer to someone else.
Things generally continue with women I want to see more than twice.
I feel that by treating a woman well, making her happy, and making an effort to accommodate her so we can build a good relationship, we naturally become closer and closer.
Since Fuu is older, I suppose I think it’s the papa’s job to adjust to her and make sure she enjoys herself so the relationship between the two of them becomes a good one, haha…
You’ve written a lot, but when it comes down to it, you want to attend a top university without having to study. And you want a long-term arrangement, but you don’t want to commit to one woman—and you get bored after meeting a few times.
So logically speaking, you don’t really want to attend a top university or maintain a long-term arrangement after all.
Ah, youth. You’re still young.
I don’t think you can find a woman who could become your life partner unless you face her with everything you have and give the relationship your all.
Looking back, the women I was able to give my absolute best to gave so much back in return and became the best partners I could have asked for.
On the other hand, even when the allowance was generous, things didn’t work out with women I couldn’t fully commit to within the arrangement.
In the end, it really is like looking in a mirror.
It may be a chicken-and-egg situation, but try giving a woman your absolute all and doing everything you can for her first. Most of the time, you won’t get anything in return, but on rare occasions, you’ll meet a woman who gives back even more than you put in. I think she may be the woman you’ve been searching for.
> I’m looking for a woman I can have a long-term relationship with.
> My standards have gotten higher.
Taken together, I think this means you want to have a long-term relationship with the most beautiful woman in the world—but that’s where the contradiction comes in.
For example, you go on a date with the woman you think is the most beautiful. Just as you decide you want to be with her long term, an even more beautiful woman joins the service about two weeks later.
You go on a date with her and think, “This time, she’s definitely the most beautiful.” Then, two weeks later, an even more beautiful woman joins.
And so on, forever.
It seems to me that using “the most beautiful woman in the world—or at least in Japan” as your standard conflicts with wanting a long-term relationship.
It’s not simply a matter of your standards getting higher. Standards of beauty change with the times, too. And everyone gets a year older after a year. If you prefer women of a certain age, then even if you intend for it to be long term, a year later she’ll be a different age.
So rather than trying to meet two contradictory conditions, I think you should narrow it down to one.
Also, if your excitement wears off after meeting someone once or twice, you may want to recognize that you’re probably not suited to a long-term relationship in the first place—you simply want to be with lots of different women.
If that’s the case, you may be better suited to upscale soaplands, high-end health services, or massages that include sexual services than to a dating club.
If you think someone is beautiful, you can simply request her again. And if your excitement fades after two or three visits, you can just move on to someone else.
It seems this is happening because you’ve come to a place that doesn’t match what you’re looking for. I hope you find somewhere that suits you soon.
Simply put, you’re just a man who isn’t satisfying enough to be chosen.
As Flag-san said, if you meet a few women during your first month, you’ll probably find someone for a long-term arrangement.
After all, you can approach wonderful women who are much more your type than anyone you’d meet through a matchmaking agency…
The difference is whether you think, “I’m giving you an allowance, so entertain me,” or, “I want to thank you for showing me a good time and give you an allowance.” If it’s not the latter, then money will be the only thing that makes you worth choosing as a papa (a male supporter).
I felt that “looking for a woman he can be with long-term” was different from me. In my case, it’s more that things ended up continuing long-term.
“Looking for a woman who can satisfy him” doesn’t really describe me either.
Unlike marriage, you can have multiple partners, so there’s no need to expect one person to fulfill everything. I think that’s why I have several.
The women I’ve stayed with—or stayed with for a long time—tend to fall into these categories:
1. Someone who went all the way along with my unusual kinks. She’s almost like someone who saved my life. After having her do that much for me, I could never just toss her aside because I got bored.
2. Someone who relies on me emotionally and brings out my paternal instincts and desire to protect.
3. Someone I’ve been with since she was a virgin, who hasn’t left the nest yet. Some relationships last over two years; I currently have three like that, and two of them have lasted more than two years.
4. Someone who feels good to look at and to be intimate with.
Some girls fit several of these categories.
Girls who are somewhat troubled—or even deeply troubled—are more likely to fulfill number 2, so I tend to become attached to them. Scars from self-harm don’t bother me at all.
You often see women write “I’m looking for someone I can be with long-term” in their profiles too. I never really thought about it, but logically, isn’t that kind of impossible?
Things only become long-term as a result. To take an extreme example, you might meet someone expecting it to end after one time, only to hit it off unexpectedly and end up continuing for a long time.
Anyway, if the person asking the question always ends things after one or two meetings, maybe those partners simply weren’t meant to be. Rather than worrying about it too much, I think you should just continue naturally, staying true to yourself.
Searching for your bluebird is fine, too. One day, you might realize that the little bird that was always right in front of you, perched on your shoulder, was the one all along.
Or maybe you’ll finally meet the right person on your hundredth try. If you’re not necessarily looking for an absolute beauty, but simply have a very narrow range of preferences, that’s entirely possible.
It’s something we papa supporters often talk about: surprisingly, our tastes rarely overlap. We’re constantly asking each other, “What do you see in her?”
I didn’t really understand the idea that meeting lots of women makes you more discerning.
I see meeting through a club as a matter of whether the two people click and are mutually interested.
I understand signing up for a new introduction because you’re hoping you might meet someone who’s a better fit. However, I don’t understand why your enthusiasm would drop after meeting someone once or twice simply because an even better woman might join later.
My criteria for continuing to see someone are whether we get along and have a good time together.
After being a member for about two and a half years, I became satisfied with my current situation and stopped looking for new people to meet.
It’s hard to answer without knowing roughly how old you are or what age groups the women you’ve offered to before belonged to.
If you’ve been targeting a specific age range, you could try making offers to a broader range—from women in their teens to their 60s. If you’ve mainly offered to women based on their looks, you might have better luck choosing based on the content of their profiles instead.
You could also ask the staff for advice.
Personally, I’d recommend someone who works a regular office job. And ideally, someone who isn’t emotionally unstable. If you’re hoping for a long-term arrangement, you probably don’t want to get involved with someone who’s struggling mentally.
It’s the same as an unpopular older guy saying, “I’ve met dozens of women through a marriage agency, but nothing ever works out.”
People are all bad at taking an honest look at themselves.
Hello!
Kousaka from the staff here.
It’s true—browsing the Universe members’ site gets you excited, and before you know it, you start thinking, “Maybe I should find an even better woman,” right?!
If I were on the men’s side, I’d probably be chasing after someone even better too.
I know a man I’m close with who is seeing several women, and he seems to have different roles for each of them:
- With A, she’s his golf girl!
- With B, they can talk about slightly niche topics and both enjoy theater, so she’s his theater girl!
- With C, they’re simply very compatible, so they have an intimate relationship.
Rather than expecting one woman to fulfill all his ideals, it seems he divides things up depending on the person!
I hope this gives you some helpful ideas!
