Indeed, men who spend a lot of money over a short period of time don’t tend to stick around for very long.
In short, a man who can afford to spend that much has plenty of options. It’s not so much that he gets bored easily—he’s probably just choosing the better options.
You can’t tell from this alone whether the papa is someone who gets bored easily.
Some people spend money even if they don’t get bored easily, while others don’t spend much. I also haven’t heard that how easily someone gets bored necessarily correlates with how much they spend.
Regardless of whether he’s the type to get bored easily, you never know when things might come to an end, so I think it’s best to avoid having regrets.
It would be helpful to understand what he likes about you and what kind of women he prefers, but I don’t think those things are easy to figure out. So I’d suggest continuing to treat him as you have been.
(At least for now, I think he likes you.)
There may be some reason for concern, but if you’re meeting two or three times a week, it sounds like things should be fine. It’s safe to assume he’s really taken a liking to you. The shopping is probably just another expression of those feelings.
Apparently, papas who have only been seeing someone for around six months to less than a year tend to make flashier purchases—close to a million yen at a time. Even so, they apparently move on to a different, fresh-faced girl before the year is up.
In my case, the club woman I met two or three times a week—or every four or five days—early on became someone I wanted to stay with forever. I liked her that much, and we’re still seeing each other.
I think the frequency of your meetings has more to do with whether things continue—and whether you’re truly his favorite—than the amount of money he spends.
From the papa’s side, I don’t think increasing how often you meet is necessarily easier than spending more money.
I’m not quite sure what “I’m easily bored, so I spend money in the short term” means. Given the questioner’s financial sense, does it mean they’re worried that he’s spending an unbelievable amount and that this can’t possibly continue for long—in other words, that because he gets bored easily, he’ll eventually drop them?
If it’s ¥2 million over three months, that works out to ¥600,000–¥700,000 a month. If they’re dating two or three times a week, that’s about ten dates a month, so an extra ¥60,000–¥70,000 per date on top of the allowance. That includes meals for both of them, with the hotel costs separate, right?
If he’s a papa who enjoys shopping or eating at expensive restaurants, isn’t that pretty normal?
In my case, I pay a ¥50,000 pay-per-meeting allowance, 48 times a month, which comes to ¥2.4 million. I also occasionally buy her everyday necessities at Aeon, but it’s usually only a few thousand yen, occasionally over ¥10,000. Meals are at most ¥10,000 or ¥20,000 for the two of us, so the total I spend on papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) each month is probably just over ¥3 million.
When I shop, I pay by card. I wonder how long it’s been since I stopped checking the total at the register. I buy what I want and don’t buy what I don’t need. I’ve never spent hundreds of millions on impulse, but spending tens of millions that way is perfectly normal for me. What about a few million? Maybe it feels like the ¥1,000 monthly allowance I got as a child.
The questioner probably can’t understand this, but many of us papas live with that kind of financial perspective. So there’s no need to worry.
And here’s the thing: not having money will definitely make you unhappy. But money can’t buy happiness. Put another way, money can only buy things that money can buy.
You can buy someone’s heart with money, but only a heart that can be bought with money. You can’t buy a heart that money can’t buy. I know I’m stating the obvious.
Tonight, the 18-year-old I live with is apparently inviting some close friends over to the apartment to hang out, so I’ll be sleeping alone at my other place. The house she grew up in was small, and her parents had their own complications, so apparently inviting friends over had always been a dream of hers. I’m more nervous than she is about them figuring out that it’s her papa-katsu papa’s place, but she must have wanted to invite her friends even more. Eighteen is still so young.
If you ask what money can buy, it can buy this kind of small happiness for her. By sharing in that happiness, I can feel happy too. That’s the kind of enjoyment I get from it.
So instead of worrying about your papa’s finances, you should simply show your happiness honestly.
Just because someone spends money in the short term doesn’t necessarily mean they’re fickle. And even if they are, that doesn’t mean they’ll quickly lose interest in their relationship with you.
Rather than jumping to odd conclusions, I think it’s better to keep checking in with them and see how things are going as you build and maintain a good relationship.
