Someone who messaged me on PATOLO has been asking various questions about other papas. I don’t mind that in itself, and I honestly answered questions like how many women I’ve met. However, she then said something along the lines of, “I asked the club, and they told me you’re still receiving offers from other women.”

He sounds like a lot of work. If you already have other papas, it might be best to turn him down. Even if you started seeing him, I have a feeling he’d eventually say things like, “I want you to see only me.” He just sounds like a hassle.

I thought both the male member and the person asking the question were partly at fault. If you felt uncomfortable, couldn’t you simply end things and leave it at that? By the way, the club can give you a rough idea of the offer situation if you ask them. From the man’s perspective, he’s asking for reference purposes because he wants to avoid a mismatch. That said, it’s also true that the club has been receiving complaints from female members who felt uncomfortable, like in this case, and is getting tired of dealing with them. So what you should do is report the facts about this disappointing male member to the club. If you do, the club will probably stop sharing his offer situation with him.

In the course of discussing things like scheduling, I sometimes hear that she also has offers from other men. Personally, I don’t drag out conversations like that through messages on the site.