I recently joined and set my type as B2, but what should I say if I’m invited to go further on the same day?
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It’s not that I’d ghost him—I’m just not comfortable with anything from the very first meeting. I’d feel more at ease doing it on the second date. Would a man feel hurt if I told him that directly? Would he react like, “Why not the first time?” (I know it depends on the person, though, haha.)
Also, if I’m invited on a first date, is it okay to assume that a B2 date will take about two hours rather than four and plan around my schedule accordingly?
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂Not stated👑Universe female member
Thank you very much for reaching out.
I’m Akai from Universe Club staff, and I’ll answer your question as well.
If you’ve set your type as B2, I think it’s perfectly fine to tell him that, as you feel, you’ve decided to begin an adult relationship from the second meeting onward. Since that’s the rule you’ve set, it’s best not to push yourself.
The first dinner is generally expected to last around two hours, but you never know what might happen during the actual date, so I recommend leaving plenty of time for whatever you have planned afterward.
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Some women only say B2 because they find it difficult to refuse, while others may be open to taking things further from the very first meeting, depending on the person.
That’s the only reason some men ask.
If you can simply say, “I’d be comfortable with that from the second meeting onward,” he won’t be offended.
As for scheduling, I wouldn’t recommend leaving only two hours open.
A full-course restaurant meal can easily take two hours in reality.
If, as the time approaches, you suddenly say, “Actually, I have another appointment afterward…,” the man may not say anything, but it will still kill the mood.
I think things tend to go more smoothly when you allow yourself plenty of time.
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Even if you hit it off with someone, I think it’s perfectly fine to say, “I’d like to start from the second meeting,” because you need time to sort out your feelings.
I assume you chose B2 for a reason, like the person asking this question, so it’s probably best to avoid anyone who ignores your dating type, tries to negotiate, and then gets hurt or angry when things don’t go their way.
In my case, things have actually worked out better with that kind of person more often, so I mainly go for B-type arrangements.
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Since you’re not a C, just confirm the terms as a matter of course without worrying, and talk about what to do next time if he brings it up.
Some papas (male supporters) will get angry or disappointed—it depends on the person. That’s why, personally, I don’t offer to Bs, haha.
As for the time, if he makes an offer, you could say, “I have plans starting at [time], so would that still be okay?” and let him know you’re calculating it based on two hours.
Still, if someone said the above after making a first offer, I’d feel a bit deflated too. But if you’re thinking long term, it might be better to put up with a little flexibility on the timing and leave it up to him...
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Whether he gets hurt depends on the person and on how you turn him down.
You could say something like, “I set it at B2 because even if I like a man, I’m not comfortable with anything more that day.”
If someone gets hurt or angry over that and reacts unreasonably, it would probably be difficult to have a good relationship with him anyway.
The time is only meant as a guideline. I also usually allow about two hours for dinner only (no intimacy), but I think it’s better not to schedule anything afterward—especially not too soon afterward.
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