If this is the first time you’ve received a notarized letter, you’re probably understandably shocked.
However, anyone can send one—not just a lawyer. It merely contains the other party’s one-sided claims. It’s also fairly common for such letters to demand an unjustifiably large amount to intimidate the recipient, only for the amount to be reduced to a more realistic figure if the matter goes to court, since litigation costs depend on the amount claimed.
Even if there’s no chance of recovering a single yen in court, a lawyer may still have no problem writing a demand for 100 million yen in a notarized letter. Some lawyers may also encourage the other party to pursue the matter because they want to earn their fee.
For now, it may be best to wait and see whether they proceed to the next stage—filing a lawsuit.
You can simply leave things as they are and wait to see whether they take the next step. In the meantime, you could consult a lawyer, or someone close to you who can introduce you to one.
If this is causing you significant emotional stress, you also have the option of paying as requested. In that case, you would need to discuss payment methods and other details with the other party’s lawyer. Even then, you may feel more comfortable handling the matter through your own lawyer. The costs will depend on the circumstances and on which side has the advantage, so it’s difficult to say in advance.
A notarized letter is something the other party can write however they please; the court has nothing to do with it. It is not an official document at all, so try to stay calm and not panic.
**Update**
If the other party’s lawyer had a case they were confident they could win, it would not be unusual for them to file a lawsuit immediately.
The harsher the contents of the letter, the more likely it may be that the lawyer believes they cannot win in court—and that their fee would therefore be reduced. They may simply want to collect a fee without going to trial.
If they were confident of winning, they could have contacted you by phone, and if negotiations broke down, proceeded to file a lawsuit—an approach that could also increase their fee.
So there’s no need to give up, and I don’t think you have to comply with one-sided demands based solely on what is written in the letter.
First, I should make it clear that I’m not a legal professional. I’m speaking only from my own experience as a layperson.
Since the other party has hired a lawyer, you’ll probably need to get one as well. Naturally, that will cost money. Have your lawyer review the details of the claim and explore the possibility of reducing the amount or having the claim withdrawn. Depending on the circumstances, they may even suggest filing a counterclaim—in other words, seeking half of the claimed amount from the papa (a male supporter). An affair can’t happen with only one person involved, so the other party bears responsibility too.
At the moment, you’re fighting on the other party’s turf. Realistically, you probably won’t have much chance of winning unless you also have a professional—namely, a lawyer—on your side.
