Tips
Oct 24, 2023 16:11
8 answers
👨 Male
Universe member
You can probably tell by whether it feels like you’re actually dating.
If you still find yourself wondering, “I wonder how this is going…” then I’d say you’re not quite there yet（笑).
Other
This is Mishima from the Shinsaibashi branch.
The answer depends on whether you met privately or through papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan). Since you’re asking here, I’ll assume it’s the latter.
If you met through papa-katsu, and that’s how your relationship began, then it’s based on a temporary arrangement from the outset. So I don’t think you’re likely to get the answer you’re hoping for.
A～Dまで一通りオファーの経験あり、多くても月１程度でLINEはスケジュール調整のみ、スマートに無理なく長期交際するスタイルです。
Age: 50s
👨 Male
Universe member
For your own peace of mind, it’s probably best to assume that any affection shown by a woman in papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) is essentially part of the business.
I’ve never expected the woman I’m seeing to genuinely fall for me.
That’s not why I’m doing this—I’m looking for someone to have an adult relationship (intimate) with, and nothing more.
🏅 パパ活歴7年目突入
彼氏/既婚/他パパ/セフレOK/全力応援
Age: 50s
👨 Male
Universe member
For a psychological perspective, try reading psychology books or watching psychology videos on YouTube.
Most women in papa-katsu aren’t attracted to the person asking the question—they’re attracted to the money, and they’re basically having sex with the money, lol.
It’s probably safest to assume that they make the person asking the question think they’re liked so they can secure the allowance.
🏅 大阪の昼寝引きこもりトレーダー
スペ90以下のひとを厚く囲い込み、一生面倒見て実質一夫多妻で大切にしたい独身です。
Age: 50s
👨 Male
Universe member
Riri-chan said there’s no way a 50-year-old guy could be genuinely liked unless he handed over around 12 million yen.
🏅 日没を遅らせる唯一の方法は日没に向かって走り続けることだ
名古屋支店登録で、男性会員としての登録名もマックさんです。コラム多数書いてますのでよろしければご参照ください。20代の細身女性が好みで逆オファーには前向きです。経験無いまたは少ない方大歓迎。
Age: 60s
👨 Male
Universe member
I was actually talking about something along those lines over lunch today: “Human feelings of like and dislike are quantum-mechanical.”
You’ve heard that elementary particles exist only as probabilities until they’re observed by a measuring device, right? Human feelings of like and dislike are similar—they become fixed the moment they’re put into words.
Until the girl verbalizes it, whether she likes the questioner or not is neither one thing nor the other. At one moment, her feelings may lean toward “like,” and at another, toward “dislike.” That’s what emotions are like. Positive and negative feelings coexist.
So pressing her or trying to force an answer is rather gauche. In fact, if you insist on confirming it, her feelings will probably swing in a negative direction because you’ll come across as pushy.
Also, instead of asking, “Do you like me?” try repeatedly telling her, “I like you. You’re cute.” Have you heard of the principle of reciprocity of liking?
Even if she initially replies, “I like you too, ○,” as a lie or just to flatter you, saying it out loud may gradually make her feel that she really does like you. It’s a form of self-suggestion. The Islamic declaration of faith, “Allah is great,” uses a similar method.
So, with the goal of guiding her toward self-suggestion, it might be effective to keep repeating, “I like you. You’re cute,” until she answers, “I like you too, ○.”
By the way, the questioner wants to confirm whether the other person likes him, but feelings change over time. Even if she thinks she likes him at one particular moment, that may have changed by the next day. Do you still want to confirm it? Doesn’t that seem rather pointless?
🏅 あなたの味方
お役に立てれば幸いです。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe staff
I don’t give a damn what she thinks of me!
I loved her!
So what if it’s unrequited?
So what if she doesn’t love me back?
I loved her, and that’s all that matters!
Age doesn’t matter either.
Neither does the fact that I can’t satisfy her in our sex life.
To love someone means giving your heart to one woman, doesn’t it?!
I don’t care about knowing or confirming how she feels, either.
Because that’s something I don’t need to know!
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe member
There are different kinds and degrees of “liking” someone, so think for yourself about what approach you can genuinely be comfortable with.
Human emotions aren’t simply a matter of 0 or 1.
I think this is something you need to reflect on and work out for yourself as you go through adolescence.