It’s not simply because they’ve gotten what they wanted.
Some people lose interest in adult relationships because they’re monotonous and unenthusiastic—doing it only because they need the money, rushing through it, or putting in minimal effort.
No matter how beautiful her face is or how great her figure, I lose interest. I start thinking, “I’m done with this. I’ll find a woman who’ll take the adult relationship more seriously.”
There are plenty of people you can make offers to here.
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I’m not thinking at all about “getting” or possessing someone.
But if I feel that she’s always genuinely keeping me in mind as she goes about her life—not some casual boyfriend or papa one day and someone else the next—I make sure to give her my undivided attention in return.
And now, it’s been five years already—or perhaps only five years?
Still, I suppose I should start thinking about preparing for her to join my household soon...
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I guess it depends on what you mean by “getting what you want.”
For me, it means that both people are satisfied, day and night.
And whether it lasts depends not just on how enjoyable the intimate side is, but also on whether you have fun together during the day. Specifically, if you enjoy talking and have similar interests, the relationship can continue even after the nighttime aspect starts to feel routine.
You won’t get bored if you can talk about things like travel and enjoy exchanging messages about your everyday lives.
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I have someone I’ve been seeing regularly for a long time, but I’ve never felt like I “got” or “secured” him.
I hope we can continue for a long time while respecting each other’s work and private lives.
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If it’s just the physical aspect you’re after, you’ll get bored of a little over half of them after about three times, assuming there are ten in total. The rest will gradually fade out naturally, and after a year, there might be one you’d actually be reluctant to let go of.
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Thank you for your question. I’ll answer as well.
I’m not quite sure what you mean by “getting her,” but if you mean the point when a woman starts to feel that she likes a man, I don’t think that necessarily means she’ll become bored with him.
If anything, I feel people are more likely to lose interest after being together for a long time and falling into a rut.
That said, I think more often than not, the relationship ends before either person has a chance to get bored.
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What do you mean by “having” someone?
Even if you have sex with them, marry them, get them pregnant, or tattoo their name on your body, I don’t think you can ever really say you’ve “gotten” that person.
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I’m definitely #2. I may not even recognize a woman as a woman if I’ve never been intimate with her in the first place (though of course I still respect her as a person).
P.S.
When a man feels that he’s “won” a woman, maybe he’s actually fallen into her trap—in other words, she’s the one who has won him over.
It’s like deciding what to do with a fish you’ve caught: either you skillfully handle it and turn it into delicious sashimi, or you fail to remove the hook and let it escape back into the water. Maybe it really just comes down to technique.
I added this after reading Kazu’s answer.
Come to think of it, there’s no real substance to “winning someone over,” is there? It’s probably just a matter of perception—an illusion.
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I think there are two types of men:
① The type whose interest peaks before the first time they sleep together, then fades afterward
② The type who grows even more attached after they first sleep together
Generally, men are said to be more often the first type, but I think men who prefer long-term relationships are the second type.
— It’s me
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