Whether it’s a dinner date, a short meeting, or an adult relationship (intimate), I say yes to invitations about 98% of the time.
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That might be understandable if I were seeing them once a week, but I’m meeting some of them around three times a week.
In romantic relationships, people say you need to turn someone down occasionally. Does the same apply to papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan)?
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂20s👑Universe female member
I’ve never even considered intentionally turning someone down when our schedules work.
Most of my papas are pretty flexible with their time, and they usually accommodate my schedule, so if I’m free on a day they invite me out, I don’t turn them down.
Do you mean playing hard to get or something? I don’t see the point.
Marika
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Does intentionally turning someone down really lead to anything good?
I don’t see the point.
Are you some kind of A-list actress?
I’ll do my best to accommodate a papa I truly want to keep.
Or, if he understands my work, we’ll adjust our schedules together.
If you want to keep receiving support in various ways, I think it’s best to make the maximum effort.
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Sometimes you need to say no, but you probably shouldn’t overthink it.
The percentages are just the outcome. Each and every time is everything—and 100%.
It’s me.
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It’s best to be 100% flexible around your papa’s schedule.
One of my papas is handsome and extremely popular, but at first, he was seeing several girls at the same time.
I think the fact that he gradually narrowed it down to just me was partly because I was easy to coordinate schedules with.
When I looked at the messages from the other girls—setting aside the obvious “You shouldn’t be reading those” criticism—they were full of things like, “I have work on the [date]…” or “About the [date], I’m really sorry, but it looks like work may run late. Would it be possible to move the time a little?”
A lot of wealthy, business-owner papas don’t like adjusting their schedules around other people. They tend to think, “Why should I be the one making the adjustment?”
So if you accommodate them 100%, your likability will skyrocket all by itself. You’ll be fine.
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Thanks for the question. I’ll share my thoughts as well.
> I turn down invitations maybe 2% of the time.
It’s unclear what that remaining 2% means. Is it when you absolutely can’t meet for some reason, or are there times when you simply don’t feel like meeting? I do wonder about that.
If you don’t have other plans, though, I feel men are more likely to appreciate you if you never turn them down.
> In romantic relationships, people say that occasionally turning someone down is necessary.
Isn’t that more of a Showa-era idea? I feel like people don’t really say that much anymore—not even in the Reiwa era.
So these days, I don’t think that kind of thing is necessary, and papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) seems to be the same.
That said, Mac sometimes writes about women who are exceptionally good at papa-katsu, and for people like that, there may be techniques involving this kind of push-and-pull to make a papa (a male supporter) become deeply invested in them.
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If he turns me down, I cut him off immediately—that’s what I do.
P.S.
It’s a good idea to make it clear that you never turn down invitations from the papa in front of you, while you do sometimes turn down invitations from other papas.
For example, you could say things like, “You’re the only one I have an adult relationship with,” or, “I have a dinner-only papa who offered me ¥〇〇 the other day and said, ‘Be with me for this,’ but I turned him down.” Show him, in that way, that you can say no clearly when there’s something you don’t like. It can even be made up, or you can slightly embellish one of the few times you’ve turned someone down.
With papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), that kind of tsundere attitude works: making him feel that you’re cold toward other men, but completely head over heels for him.
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