Tips Feb 16, 2023 19:30

I’ve been seeing two PJ partners for about six months through papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan). But now I’ve started becoming interested in a third one! (I have about eight favorites, and my personal rule is to see no more than two per month.)

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I’m thinking of ending things with one of them, but she hasn’t done anything wrong, so wouldn’t it be cruel to suddenly cut her off? Since I’d be ending it purely because of my own selfishness, I feel really guilty about it. In this situation, should I tell her the reason for saying goodbye, or not? Since papa-katsu is just a casual arrangement, it’s normal and acceptable for people to end things or be dumped, right? I’d appreciate any advice on how to part ways smoothly!
👤 Asked by Guest 👨GenderMale 🎂 Not stated 👑 Universe male member
💗 Likes 0 👁️ Views 106 💬 Answers 20
🔖 ID D/fy0-00000 🎯 Looking for answers from 誰でも

10 answers

マックさん
🏅 日没を遅らせる唯一の方法は日没に向かって走り続けることだ
名古屋支店登録で、男性会員としての登録名もマックさんです。コラム多数書いてますのでよろしければご参照ください。20代の細身女性が好みで逆オファーには前向きです。経験無いまたは少ない方大歓迎。
Age: 60s 👨 Male Universe member
I think it might help to imagine how you’d say goodbye to a dog or cat so they wouldn’t be hurt when you bought one from a pet shop, got bored of it, and decided to take it to an animal shelter.
(3 replies left)
If you say, “My wife found out… She took my phone, so don’t message me on LINE for a while,” I don’t think she’ll message you. She’ll probably think you’re an idiot for making it so obvious. You’ve totally lost here.
(3 replies left)
ダイ
A~Dまで一通りオファーの経験あり、多くても月1程度でLINEはスケジュール調整のみ、スマートに無理なく長期交際するスタイルです。
Age: 50s 👨 Male Universe member
I don’t disagree with the idea that, since it’s just for fun, ending things or being cut off is simply part of everyday life and should be accepted. But when I’ve been fortunate enough to meet someone, I want to treat them with sincerity and engage with them properly, even if it is just for fun. I think our fundamental ways of thinking are probably different.
(3 replies left)
前澤(スタッフ)
前澤(スタッフ) Male Column Send a reverse offer to this responder
🏅 あなたの味方
お役に立てれば幸いです。
Age: Private 👨 Male Universe staff
> It would be sad to suddenly cut things off with a PJ who hasn’t done anything wrong, wouldn’t it? Especially since I’d be ending things simply because of my own selfish reasons, I can’t help feeling really guilty. Everyone sees it differently, but if there are eight PJs, aren’t the other six also going to feel hurt? In the end, isn’t ending things for selfish reasons the same either way? I didn’t really understand the difference there.
(3 replies left)
Before indulging in your own self-importance, why not properly say goodbye? Since you’re an allowance papa, let her spend that time looking for a new papa. The thought process of “She’d be pitiful if I cut her off, right?” is honestly creepy. Akari
(3 replies left)
I usually don’t give a reason when I’m the one ending things. In relationships between men and women, I feel that not giving a reason is often the most natural approach.
(3 replies left)
だて◎ゆめ
👨 Male Universe member
There’s no such thing as a smooth way to break up. Didn’t you learn that in elementary school? Once you graduate from college, like I did, you’ll keep seeing a woman indefinitely until she’s the one to announce that it’s over. A dating club isn’t a place to fool around. Go back and start over from elementary school.
(3 replies left)
I happened to be listening to “Turing Love feat. Nanawo Akari,” so at first glance I thought, “Wow, what an amazing question about Euler!” The gentlemanly thing to do is to part ways cleanly and amicably. I’m genuinely curious whether he actually uses “oira.”
(3 replies left)
カズ
Age: Private 👨 Male Universe member
I don’t think there’s much point in asking what other people would do. If it were me and I only had about two partners at the moment, I’d increase the number of people I was seeing. Once it starts to exceed what I can handle, our schedules naturally stop lining up, and we end things.
(3 replies left)
If you say, “I’ve started becoming interested in another woman,” most women will back off— in more ways than one. I once received a message saying, “I’ve stopped doing this kind of thing.” Of course, I don’t know whether it was true, but I appreciated them telling me that.
(3 replies left)