It’s getting to the time of year when the women I’m seeing start bringing up Valentine’s Day.
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It’s still a little early, but what does everyone do for White Day? It doesn’t feel as special as Christmas or a birthday, and I’m already wondering what to give them in return before I’ve even received any chocolate.
Would women be put off if I doubled their allowance? I’m not very good with gifts, so maybe we could go shopping together? But then I start worrying about how much would be acceptable.
Honestly, Valentine’s Day is kind of awkward.
I like giving gifts, but even when I receive chocolate, I feel bad about having to carry it home—and I don’t really eat that much of it anyway...
I’d be happier if, when we met, she kissed me a little longer than usual or was slightly more proactive. Honestly, just knowing she feels that way would be enough for me, haha.
👤Asked byGuest👨GenderMale🎂40s👑Universe male member
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Hatta from Universe Club here as well.
White Day can certainly be a tricky one, can’t it?
When I was a student, I once went all out and gave a friend some elaborate homemade sweets in return, and it made them uncomfortable.
These days, I usually give something small and useful, like hand cream costing about twice as much as what I received.
Some people might be surprised if they suddenly received double the value, but since it’s White Day, I don’t think anyone would be put off by giving twice as much.
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Would sushi or teppanyaki that’s a little more expensive than usual be out of the question?
Would makeup items costing no more than ¥10,000 not be enough?
The best thing to do is ask her directly.
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I agree with Rin too!
It makes me really happy when he feels that way. There are lots of things I’d like, but I’m not good at asking for them. So when something extra is added to my allowance, I’m happy because it lets me buy things I normally couldn’t afford.
Alternatively, I think it would help avoid any awkwardness if he asked what I’d like within a certain price range.
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The last time I got one, we ate it together in his room.
While we were eating, I said, “I can’t take it home, so you don’t have to go to the trouble next time. I’m happy you thought of me, though, and I’ll gratefully accept the sentiment.” After that, he stopped giving them to me.
As for returning the favor, I’m sure she’d appreciate it if you doubled the allowance.
Unless it’s something she genuinely wants, she probably won’t be happy to receive a gift. I think she’d appreciate the money more.
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I totally agree with Rin too! It’s really sweet that you’re already thinking about how to return the favor before even receiving anything—it shows so much kindness and affection.
If you’re worried about it, why not ask when you receive it? Something like:
“Thank you, I’m really happy.”
“I was thinking of giving you ___ in return. What do you think?”
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For birthdays, Christmas, White Day—all of them—I add extra cash. Not enough to double the allowance, though.
Whether it’s 1,000 yen or 10 million yen, a man should give whatever he enjoys giving and likes. The allowance is separate, after all.
Don’t think of it in terms of gains and losses. I believe in keeping my circle small and selective, so if you start out intending to support her for life, you’ll naturally come to understand what she needs.
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> Would she be put off if I gave her double the allowance?
If anything, she’d be more likely to be put off by something other than double the allowance.
It’s pretty hard to come up with something that beats double the allowance.
> Maybe going shopping together?
For something as minor as White Day, double the allowance is obviously the better choice.
The important thing is understanding all of that before entering this kind of relationship. It’s an allowance-based relationship, after all.
Once you fully understand that, if you can still choose something that makes her think, even just a little, “Oh, nice—you really came through,” or “This is amazing (I’m so happy),” I think it’ll bring you much closer.
Even the same gesture can come across differently—and be more or less moving—depending on the thought behind it.
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You’re so thoughtful to already be thinking about giving something back before you’ve even received anything!
I don’t think anyone would mind having their allowance doubled?! If you were in a regular romantic relationship and the “return gift” was cash, you might think, “Wait, what?” But in a relationship where an allowance is involved, I think it’s perfectly fine.
Of course, I’d be happy to receive something I wanted, too. It probably depends on the person, so why not ask, “What would you like in return?”
Personally, I’d already be happy just knowing you wanted to give something back.
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I think doubling the allowance would be fair.
Whether you go shopping together depends on your relationship and whether she wants to, so I think it’s best to ask her directly.
Marika
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