How do you deal with a papa who focuses on nipples?
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During an adult relationship (intimate), there’s a papa who spends about 10 minutes touching my nipples. Even when I say things like, “If you keep going, I’m going to want you to put it in,” or “I’ll return the favor,” he just says, “Not yet 😄,” and keeps going. Even during penetration, he pulls out once and starts touching them again. I told him it hurt, but that didn’t work… How do you all deal with someone like this?
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I like licking nipples too, though.
Well, I imagine that man probably doesn’t have much experience dating women.
You could wait until he gets tired of it to some extent, but if it’s become unbearable, then breaking up is probably your only option.
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If he won’t listen, tell him your nipples got sore from being licked too much, and put some bitter medicine on them.
The kind that tastes awful if he licks them, lol.
If he still doesn’t stop after that, it’s time to say goodbye.
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Even men who are into sadism (unless they’re psychopaths) get startled when they hear “Ouch!”
I’ve heard that because women need to feel good, get wet, and climax in order to conceive, hearing “That hurts!” really makes them deflate.
I say it too when it hurts or feels too intense: “Ah, sorry—is that okay?” or “I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” Then they gently move on to the next thing (I guess?).
Also, the way you say “Ouch” matters.
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I’m Takahashi, a staff member.
There probably isn’t any one set way to handle this. If you truly don’t want her to quit, I recommend clearly expressing how you feel, making sure she understands, and then continuing your relationship.
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In any case, just say, “My nipples aren’t sensitive, so please don’t touch them.”
If you respond to the question as written, it may come across as though you enjoy it and welcome it.
Men don’t realize that women’s nipples generally aren’t as sensitive as men assume, and that nipple stimulation isn’t necessarily needed.
A man may be perfectly happy having his nipples caressed for hours on end. Even if it continues endlessly, it can still feel pleasant because they aren’t necessarily an erogenous zone. Men also tend to mistakenly assume that, because women have breasts, they must be the equivalent of male genitals.
For women, pleasure can depend on the breasts as a whole, how they’re touched or massaged, and how that stimulation works together with the vulva and clitoris. Timing matters too. Some may respond more to the décolletage than the nipples, or to the surrounding areas, roots, or thighs rather than the vulva. It’s complicated, and there are huge individual differences, so men can’t easily understand it.
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I’ve never met anyone like that, but if it were me, I’d probably choose one of these three options:
1. Give him the same amount of nipple play
If I kept touching him back whenever he touched me, maybe he’d realize he was touching me too much.
2. Say afterward that it stung when I took a shower
Something like, “I think it got rubbed raw and split a little…”
3. At the very least, ask him to be gentler
If I kept gently telling him that it hurt, maybe he’d at least touch me more carefully.
Just like the person I met the other day who wanted three hours of penetration, everyone has different preferences. You really meet all kinds of people.
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