I’m the one who just posted about traveling with my papa (a male supporter).

Whether you’d have to pay for yourself is a minor detail, but the bottom line is that since you don’t want to go, there’s no need to force yourself. This is pretty much the same as what I wrote in my previous answer, but there’s no benefit to continuing to see someone who’s boring to be around or stingy. I think you should pretend to be clueless and say, “Wait, does that mean I’d have to pay for myself?” Be prepared for the possibility that this may be the end of things, though.

I answered the original post as well, but I honestly felt this was essentially paying out of pocket. I also think both women and men should basically be free to decide why they participate in papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan). Likewise, I believe men should generally be free to decide how much allowance to pay. That said, mutual agreement should be the basic rule. If the man is truly the gentleman I believe one would find at a dating club, he should either clearly discuss those terms himself or, at the very least, avoid disappointing the woman in a way like this. As I mentioned in my answer to another question, I seem to remember dating club websites saying that they were places where gentlemen gathered. But now that I’ve become an answerer, I’ve realized once again that this isn’t necessarily the case. Even when I hear about other men from the women I date, I often think there are a lot of terrible ones out there. At a dating club where compensated dating is the premise, I think it’s perfectly normal to discuss money smoothly, so I don’t think this situation was remotely being “all about money.” Of course, men should act like gentlemen, and women should also conduct themselves like ladies. If you ask who should take the lead, then in the context of a dating club, I think the older, adult man should lead the way as a gentleman.

> Asking whether he would cover your allowance and travel expenses for the trip That’s the worst—please don’t go. You should go with a papa (a male supporter) who doesn’t make you feel that anxious. More importantly, you’re being way too focused on money, so you’re attracting men who are just as money-minded and stingy.

I’m with Dai! If you do papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) just to make ends meet, I think you’ll lose sight of the good parts of dating. It might be better to work elsewhere to support yourself, and focus on the relationship aspect when using a dating club.

I think papa-katsu can be tough when you’re relying on it to cover your living expenses. For your mental well-being, it’s better to use papa-katsu only as a supplement. The least stressful approach is to cover your living expenses with a regular day job, and use papa-katsu for things like student loan payments, beauty treatments, and luxury purchases. As for trips, it might be best to say yes when you genuinely feel like accompanying him occasionally without an allowance. Then, if he gives you some extra allowance on top of that, wouldn’t you be able to appreciate it more sincerely?

Were you looking for an answer that simply suited you? That wouldn’t actually help you. You hadn’t agreed on the allowance with the man, had you? If you consider this work, don’t leave it up to the other person—make sure to settle the terms clearly. Then tell him, “I can’t leave that early because I’ll be charged a cancellation fee.” After that, you can block and delete him. Also, I didn’t think you were paying out of pocket either. “Paying out of pocket” means covering the travel expenses with money from your own wallet.

I understand why you’re feeling upset and seeking advice because your papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) hasn’t been going well. But in a way, I think there were some positive aspects to what happened this time. For example: - You learned what your papa (a male supporter) values. - You realized that, without an allowance, you wouldn’t want to travel with your current papa. - From other people’s advice, you learned that your perspective isn’t necessarily the same as everyone else’s. From now on, when someone invites you on a trip, try to casually confirm the allowance beforehand. When you feel that you’ve made a mistake, I think it’s better to focus on how you can use it as a stepping stone rather than dwell on it. Just consider it one lesson learned. In reality, you haven’t failed that badly. Some people want a papa but can’t find one, so I think looking at things positively instead of feeling down will help you feel better. Also, answering questions is basically volunteer work, and we aren’t paid for it. If I were the person asking, I would simply be grateful that someone took the time to answer.

Since this isn’t really a question, I assume it’ll be hidden, so I’ll keep this brief. If you calculate mine on a pay-per-meeting basis, it’s 5 too, haha. The more often you meet, the more it naturally stops being 5 per meeting, right? Haha. I’m sorry for giving such an inconsiderate answer. And thank you for reading so many of my responses. I’m more of a meddlesome older-aunt type, to be honest. Of course, I understand from your question that you’re doing this for the money. But I commented that way because I personally think it’s pretty dangerous when receiving money becomes something you take for granted. In papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), getting paid is expected, but there are still aspects of it that shouldn’t be treated as a given. I think it’s important to remain grateful for the fact that you’re able to receive money. When I read that you already felt as though you’d been paid, I also wondered whether you might be letting money consume too much of you. You didn’t earn that money entirely through your own efforts. (If you feel that you’re earning it through your body, then I think that’s essentially the same as running your own adult-entertainment business.) It seemed to me that you might be taking advantage of someone else’s resources. The reason I said all this is because I think you may struggle in the future if you reach a point where you can no longer do papa-katsu. When I feel that way, I tend to make harsh comments. Ultimately, this is just my personal opinion. And since I don’t do papa-katsu purely for the money, my way of thinking is completely different from yours. To me, the money is simply a token of gratitude from my papas. In return, I show my gratitude through my feelings and consideration toward them. That’s how I express my appreciation. That’s why, even when we argue, I never forget that I should try to talk things through to the very end. What matters most to me is the time I spend with men, along with the unfamiliar topics, knowledge, and experiences I gain. When someone is genuinely asking for advice, I answer normally. So perhaps you should take another look at the position you’re putting yourself in. If you do, I think you’ll find that you’re standing at the complete opposite end from me, and I already understand that we’re unlikely to see eye to eye. I’m the kind of person who tries to turn setbacks into opportunities, and I take responsibility for my words in all my relationships, whether with men or women. Anyway, that’s just my personal opinion. Please keep doing your best along the path you believe in.