Tips
Jun 3, 2022 08:12
13 answers
A～Dまで一通りオファーの経験あり、多くても月１程度でLINEはスケジュール調整のみ、スマートに無理なく長期交際するスタイルです。
Age: 50s
👨 Male
Universe member
If things have progressed to an actual relationship, then honestly, all you need to do is improve your intimate skills.
My allowance is only ¥50,000 per pay-per-meeting arrangement—not particularly high—but once things progress to an adult relationship (intimate), my partners always say they want to see me again.
The only other possible issue is your scent, so if you’re aware of that, make sure to take care of your breath with regular brushing, mints like FRISK, and so on.
美惺（みさと）
?
Send a reverse offer to this responder
Other
Even if things progress to an adult relationship (intimate), could the reasons it doesn’t continue be:
1. He didn’t keep a condom on until the end
2. The allowance was too low
3. The physical compatibility wasn’t there—or he was just bad at it and it hurt
4. He was boring to talk to
5. She has another good papa (a male supporter)
Are these the likely reasons?
Other
I’ve been seeing the women I met for a second time for anywhere from just under a year to about two years, so I’m not sure how helpful this will be, but I’ll share my experience.
The allowance varies depending on the person. I increase it based on my own feelings and judgment, rather than the other person’s requests. I also think I generally start higher than what’s considered average.
In most cases, I match their preferred frequency of contact.
As for gifts, I give them something for Valentine’s Day, Christmas, and their birthday. I ask what they would like, but so far I’ve only been seeing women who don’t want cash, so I give them actual gifts. If they don’t have anything specific in mind, though, I think cash would be fine.
I’ll travel with them if they say they’d like to go. The soonest was when our second date was a trip. With the others, I think it was after we’d been seeing each other for about six months.
🏅 ４０歳でリアル異世界転生したオッサン l 元金融マン → 現ＡＩ界隈
出張ホストの実技試験合格してるので、対女性への無難な前戯とかマナーに一定の知見あり。
Age: 40s
👨 Male
Universe member
Same here. In papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), I usually get dumped after about six months at most.
But I think that’s fine for a papa-katsu-type relationship. So I don’t do anything special to keep things going, and I don’t plan to in the future.
Other
As everyone has said, gifts and trips have nothing to do with why an arrangement continues in the early stages.
I’ve realized that, in relationships between men and women, there are:
① People who don’t care that much about looks as long as they enjoy talking with someone, the sex is good, and so on; and
② People who don’t feel sexual desire in the first place unless the other person is exactly their type.
(According to my very limited research, n=4!)
I get the impression that arrangements with the former type tend to last longer. If the person who made an offer to you is the latter type, it may be difficult for things to continue unless you’re exactly their type.
Another possibility is that your allowance is relatively low compared with what others offer.
If you happen to learn that it’s her birthday early on, I think simply increasing her allowance a little would be fine. It’s better than giving a poorly chosen gift and getting it wrong.
As for trips, I think it’s fine to go if things continue for a while and she invites you.
Marika
Other
I think she can put up with it for the first meeting, but isn’t motivated to continue.
→ Either the sex, appearance, or allowance is underwhelming, or the conversation is so boring that it’s painful for her.
It’s probably one of these. If she were satisfied with everything, she’d definitely keep seeing you.
🏅 あなたの味方
お役に立てれば幸いです。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe staff
I believe that when a relationship with a woman doesn’t last, you should assume the allowance is too low.
I’ve heard opinions from both men and women, so I’m almost certain this is the case. But you can’t exactly tell a man that. You understand why you can’t say, “I asked the woman, and she said your allowance was too low,” right?
So, reluctantly, you try asking indirectly:
“Could it be that the allowance was a little low?”
And the man says things like:
“No, that’s not it. She never said anything, and she was happy with that allowance. She even said she was pleased, and she always looked like she was having fun and smiling when we met.”
But then he’ll also say he has no idea why she suddenly stopped responding.
Which makes me want to say, “That’s because I’m asking her!” (笑)
I don’t understand why they’re so confident in themselves.
For example, even if a question-box respondent says they’re doing well with ¥50,000, the question is:
“Are you exactly the same person as that respondent?”
Just because someone is successful with ¥50,000 doesn’t mean you’ll get the same results.
Even if the allowance is the same, your appearance may be different, your conversation may be less enjoyable, or the woman may not have as much fun spending time with you.
Maybe that other man has given women tens of millions of yen or expensive gifts. There’s also a chance that, even with the same allowance, the woman can sense how much financial leeway each man really has.
Driving at 100 km/h in a car with a top speed of 400 km/h is completely different from driving at 100 km/h in a car with a top speed of 110 km/h.
The latter is using the engine’s maximum power, so the engine is roaring, and even a slight jolt can throw the car off balance. It would feel frightening to ride in.
So even though both are traveling at 100 km/h, they’re worlds apart.
That’s why there’s no point using someone else’s allowance as a reference. You should try different things.
If you really want to find out whether the allowance is the issue, try offering the next woman you meet twice what you’ve paid before. If that still doesn’t work, then there may be another cause. But logically speaking, if doubling the allowance still doesn’t help, then either the original allowance was far too low or there’s some other problem.
I think you can call yourself experienced only when you’re able to say, “The allowance doesn’t matter.”
You’re not at that level yet, so keep working on yourself.
🏅 プロおぢ。ほんとはプロパパと名乗りたいけど名乗るほどの実力がない名古屋の汚っさんです。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe member
The reason these relationships don’t continue is that your “value for money” is poor. If there are any other reasons, they’re unavoidable ones—she got married, found a boyfriend, moved far away, and so on.
Low value for money = your allowance is lower than what your profile warrants.
Try offering an allowance of 10, for example. That would improve your value for money in her eyes, and the relationship will probably continue.
I also think there’s a reasonable connection between a woman’s class and her allowance.
In fact, based on my own dating experience, I know for a fact that Black-class women have received higher allowances than Standard-class women. That makes the other male respondents here the unusual cases, not me.
Papa supporters can also be valued or discarded depending on their profile and allowance amount, so it’s only fair that both sides treat people differently depending on who they’re dealing with.
Incidentally, the monthly arrangement who receives by far the highest allowance from me is a Platinum-class woman. But looking at the average, Black-class women do tend to receive higher allowances.
I’ve never been turned down for an arrangement after meeting in person, but there have been two occasions when we couldn’t agree on the allowance through a letter date. One was a Black-class woman and the other was Platinum.
As I recall, the pay-per-meeting amounts were 14 for the Black-class woman and 13 for the Platinum-class woman.
Fortunately, I wasn’t particularly keen on either of them, so when they turned me down, I was actually relieved.
That said, I’d bet money that one of them will eventually get in touch saying, “It’s been a while.” Fewer than 1% of papa supporters on Universe can offer 13 or 14, and she still appears to be active, after all. lol
*Of course, even if she contacts me, I’ll just leave the message unread.*
🏅 倶楽部女性のご主人様に潤いを！
Mパパ、永遠の交際継続中！
B1タイプ〜A寄りパパです！
会う度大人は嫌と感じる方………ご相談ください。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe member
If you think about what the other person wants first, you’ll eventually be able to get what you want too—this applies beyond the club as well.
If you want to meet, let the woman be the one to reach out.
If she wants to travel, let her be the one to suggest it.
When it comes to the allowance, think about your own style rather than worrying about which class she belongs to. From a woman outside the club’s perspective, even 20,000 or 30,000 yen changing hands is a significant amount of money.
You should also reflect on the fact that, since the woman is receiving an allowance, there’s usually little reason for her to end the relationship unless something major happens.
P.S.
As Kazu wrote, I think the sex is not quite up to par.
“Improve your bedroom skills.”
Sex is for the woman’s sake. Enjoy it and keep improving together—to the point where you might even feel that the allowance for sex should be paid to the woman instead.
Other
I think she’s in a situation where she’s putting up with things(´･ ･`)
As for the cause, it could be what you suspect—her allowance, how often you contact her, trips, or gifts—or it could be something completely different, such as personality issues or simply not being compatible.
There are endless possibilities(>_<)
Since we haven’t heard each girl’s side, it’s impossible to say. If you don’t want her to leave, increasing her allowance might help!
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe member
Not particularly. I don’t think there’s any connection between a woman’s class and her allowance.
As for how often I keep in touch, I gauge it based on the woman’s personality. I generally don’t give gifts, though if we’ve been seeing each other for a few months, I might give her something like lingerie if it comes up naturally in conversation.
I don’t travel together unless the woman says she’d like to go somewhere.
In any case, gifts and trips are a long way off from the first date.
If things aren’t leading to a second meeting, I wonder if the sex itself might not be very good.
Other
Good morning from Hiroshima.
I’m Ayase Nana ♡
As for how often to keep in touch… I don’t think every day is a good idea. About three times a week should be fine, don’t you think?
As for gifts and trips, I think it’s better to wait until you’ve been seeing each other for a few months. I sometimes see posts in the Q&A box from people saying they gave a gift and then got blocked, so they couldn’t get in touch anymore.
Rather than changing the allowance based on the woman’s class, I think you should increase it if she doesn’t seem to be forcing herself to meet you.
After all, you wouldn’t enjoy meeting someone who was only doing it reluctantly, right?
Keep making offers until you find someone who’s a good fit. I’m sure you’ll find the right person.
🏅 大阪の昼寝引きこもりトレーダー
スペ90以下のひとを厚く囲い込み、一生面倒見て実質一夫多妻で大切にしたい独身です。
Age: 50s
👨 Male
Universe member
I message her about as often as she messages me—I don’t send follow-up texts.
I don’t give gifts; I only give cash. I also don’t change the allowance based on her membership tier.
If she says she’d like to travel, I try to make it happen somewhere nice. Sometimes I book two separate single rooms. I never invite her on trips myself.
Things tend to continue when you put yourself in her shoes, think about why she’s using a dating club, and help address that.