I’d like some advice too, since there was a discussion about “letter dating” recently.

For men, I think it’s fair to assume that if a meeting falls through even once, they’re no longer interested in meeting. Personally, I think the service should eliminate regular setting offers and switch exclusively to letter dates. If we think of setting arrangements as analog and letter dates as digital, it seems like the right time to improve speed and staff efficiency in line with the times. At the same time, focusing those resources on attracting new women would be essential to maintaining support from both men and women. The number of male members will likely continue to grow, and if staff have to keep handling all those male members, the quality of new female members could decline, which might ultimately drive men away. What men want is an influx of new female members. I hope this creates a positive cycle in which the men drawn to them include the kind of men women are looking for as well.

After trying a letter date, my honest takeaway is, “Regular offers are still better.” The back-and-forth before meeting is tedious, and there isn’t enough interaction to really get a sense of what the other person is like. Then, if it ultimately ends without ever meeting, all that communication was completely wasted. So it’s understandable that you’re upset. Marika

I may be in the minority among the respondents, but I’m also in favor of letter dates. Even if the system were to be improved—for example, by prohibiting men rated two stars or below from using letter dates—I don’t think it would cause any major problems. It’s truly unfortunate that you made plans nine times over three months, only to be turned down each time. Please make sure to leave him negative feedback. With letter dates, some people may genuinely want to take their time before meeting, but normally, once you make plans, you’re expected to show up. Rescheduling nine times is abnormal behavior to begin with. I think you should be glad you avoided having to meet someone like that. In fact, I’ve heard stories of women having a miserable time on a set-up date because the man lectured them for the entire two-hour first dinner. If all you’re getting is a mere ¥5,000–¥10,000, don’t you think it’s better to say goodbye before meeting him?

The person asking the question has really been through a lot. Block him right away. Even if you met him, there’s no way he’d offer a decent allowance. I’m in favor of letter dating, and I’m incredibly grateful to the “puzzled sixty-something.” The biggest advantage of letter dating is that you can tell each other the allowance amount—or ask about it in advance. “I don’t want to meet someone without letter dating because I won’t know what kind of person he is. I can also find out the allowance amount beforehand, and if it doesn’t meet what I’m looking for, I can save myself the trouble of meeting him.” That was said by an exceptional black-ranked girl who entered a monthly arrangement this year. She was Type B, but it developed into an adult relationship (intimate) from the very first day. That was what she wanted. During letter dating, I tell them the allowance amount as soon as possible after saying hello, along with the kind of relationship I’m looking for. I think this black-ranked girl felt that the allowance I offered was higher than what she had hoped for, but she told me during the letter-dating stage that she was open to an adult relationship from the first day. I had already given the club representative a detailed report, starting from the letter-dating stage. For popular girls who are in a position to choose, women who want to settle on just one papa (a male supporter), and women who would turn down even an attractive older man if the allowance was below their expectations, letter dating can be very effective. Especially with offers from far away—if a woman travels to meet someone and discovers that the allowance is ridiculously low, she’ll be disappointed. She’d probably want to shout, “Give me back all the time and effort I wasted!”

Nine times…!? You must have been put through the wringer (>_<) I can’t do anything beyond dinner with someone I don’t trust. Trust is important, after all (>_<) I’m a bit too serious-minded… I’d probably let them down gently and say goodbye.

If you’ve exchanged messages around five times and still haven’t made plans to meet, and there’s no allowance for the LINE messaging either, I think it’s fine to cut him off. Apparently, when women stop replying, some men complain to Universe. But the staff seem fed up with men who come to them saying, “Don’t complain to us just because you can’t win her over,” so I think you’ll be fine. It might be a good idea to really make them fed up and push them to review the system.

I AGREE with Mac. Letter dating may benefit men who want to avoid paying the offer fee, but there’s really no benefit for women. Men who want to be stingy can chat with women on LINE without paying any allowance. From the woman’s perspective, it’s the worst possible situation: having to endlessly respond for free to LINE messages from male members who have no intention of making an offer. It does lower the barrier for men and women who live far apart to meet, but when they live nearby, do we really need letter dating as an option? If you’re nearby, just meet already! LOL To the person who asked this question: putting up with it for three months must have been exhausting. And I think your point is absolutely valid! The right move is to cut things off as soon as you think, “This guy has no intention of meeting,” but given the current situation, that’s hard to do. The letter-dating exchange is supposed to be a means of meeting, not the goal itself. I think we need two things: a system to weed out men who treat LINE chatting as the goal, and some kind of benefit for women whose exchanges don’t lead to an offer. It’s me