I considered giving my closest companion a monthly allowance, but since our days off rarely line up, I’m thinking of adding to the pay-per-meeting allowance and separately transferring her rent and daily food expenses via PayPay. How much would be enough for her to eat healthily each day—and how much would she appreciate? She’s a woman in her 30s who keeps insisting that she feels bad accepting it.
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Apparently, she spends money every day she works on lunch and snacks during her break at convenience stores. If I include breakfast and dinner as well, would 1,000 yen a day be too little? I don’t mind if she uses it for other things, but I’m new to this and wanted to ask for some advice.
👤Asked byGuest👨GenderMale🎂50s👑Universe male member
You should think about your own lifestyle.
For me, breakfast and dinner together cost more than 1,000 yen.
I order RIZAP meals on Rakuten to help limit my carb intake, and they’re advertised as affordable at just under 900 yen per meal.
Also, she probably has other papas besides you, so I don’t think you need to worry about covering her living expenses.
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You’ll set yourself up for failure if you try to cover everything from the very beginning. Judging by the current situation, I feel like calculating every little detail may actually rub her the wrong way.
At first, I think the pay-per-meeting allowance plus a separate transfer for rent should be enough.
If the relationship deepens, it may be better to provide money based on her lifestyle—for example, covering a specific expense like orthodontic treatment.
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Think it over for yourself and decide after discussing it with the other person.
I don’t know what you’re hoping for, and whether the allowance is too much or too little depends on the other person.
If they’re saying they feel sorry about it, it might be fine to leave things as they are...
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I also think Mr. Maezawa’s approach is the better option.
I once had a monthly arrangement for a short time, but things didn’t work out because of disagreements over how often we should meet, and we eventually parted ways. Looking back, I think the problem was that the monthly allowance was somewhere in the middle—not quite enough. I regret that it was my fault.
If you’re considering ending the monthly arrangement because your schedules rarely line up, then I think it would be even better to end it.
Personally, I just increase the amount I put in the envelope when we meet on a pay-per-meeting basis.
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If you’re new to this, I think it’s better not to do that.
Before long, you’ll start hearing things like:
“I’m paying your rent, though.”
“I’m covering your food expenses, though.”
“I’m doing this and that for you, though.”
No one will end up happy.
If you’re going to worry about such trivial things, I think you should simply double her pay-per-meeting allowance.
If it’s currently ¥50,000 per meeting, just make it ¥100,000.
That way, it’s simply an allowance, so it won’t turn into awkward talk about how you’re paying for this or that—and I think she’ll be happy too.
The moment you start nitpicking over rent and food expenses, it says a lot about you.
Just increase her allowance.
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I’m Awa Awa~ A monthly arrangement means you two must be really close (*^^*)
I’m not familiar with the allowance rates in that kind of arrangement, but I manage to keep my monthly food expenses down to ¥35,000♪ (not including eating out). Food is cheaper where I live, and I cook for myself♪
So, divided by 31 days, that comes to about ¥1,129 a day…
If you’re hoping to eat healthily without cutting back too much, why not add a little to that amount?
Using olive oil, avoiding Chinese-produced foods as much as possible, staying away from processed foods, and so on brings it to about that level (*^^*)
Though, ¥1,129 a day is already an extremely frugal budget, so ¥1,000 a day might be pretty tough（笑） I’m starting to feel embarrassed writing all this…
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