This is a continuation of my story about Type B, whom I suspect of misrepresenting her dating type.
This content is machine-translated.
It’s a long one.
She’s positive, active, and the kind of girl who makes anything she eats look delicious.
https://universe-club.jp/help/questions/view/11444
https://universe-club.jp/help/questions/view/11464
Sorry to start with the conclusion.
In the end, I turned down the fourth date myself.
Here’s what happened.
After going back and forth about it many times, I told her during our messages before the fourth date:
“I’ll invite you next time. As I told you at the beginning, the allowance will be 50,000 yen.”
A day later, she replied:
“Would 100,000 yen be okay?”
I personally wouldn’t mind paying 100,000 yen if that’s what she wanted—and if we agreed on it in advance.
But this situation was different.
I had told her my terms on our first date. I also asked what she wanted, but she didn’t give me a specific amount.
Maybe she was caught off guard at the time and couldn’t answer properly. Even so, we met twice after that, and I would have been fine with it if she had told me at some point. But she never did.
That meant the terms in my mind were fixed at 50,000 yen, and I made my decisions based on that. I just couldn’t change them afterward.
It may sound strange, but agreeing to that would feel unfair—like allowing someone to change the rules after the fact. It might be a little similar to Taro’s answer last time.
In the end, I thought that even if I paid 100,000 yen and had an adult relationship (intimate), I probably wouldn’t be able to enjoy it. I also felt that it would likely be the last time we saw each other.
I believe these relationships aren’t just about a man’s desires; they’re also about getting to know each other. Even though money is involved, I think it serves as a kind of buffer so that neither person becomes too serious. Besides, I don’t ask for an adult relationship every time we meet.
I explained all of that honestly, as politely as possible.
Two minutes later, she replied with just:
“Thanks for everything till now, bye-bye(^^)/”
And that was it. It ended remarkably abruptly.
My questions are:
What exactly did I do wrong?
(I’d appreciate answers about anything other than the amount of the allowance.)
Also, would you go on the date in this situation?
Please save this troubled, perpetually-pubescent soul.
👤Asked byGuest👨GenderMale🎂30s👑Universe male member
I’ve been through what I suspected was a “relationship-type scam” too, so I know exactly how you feel.
It simply means the chemistry wasn’t there. Women say they can decide whether they want to pursue a relationship almost immediately after meeting someone...
But think about it carefully. In its own way, this worked out for the best.
First of all, if you had started seeing her and eventually decided to end things, you would have had to turn her down later. This time, you don’t have to do that.
Also, sooner or later, you’re bound to meet another woman with a similar look who will say yes to dating you.
When that happens, you’ll genuinely think she’s cute. So if you really hit it off with her and stay together for two or three years, people will start calling you a “former handsome guy,” regardless of what you look like now.（笑）
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I hate to say it, but for her, communicating with you probably wasn’t that important or valuable.
Sending a simple “goodbye” LINE message two minutes later was basically her way of saying, “What a hassle.”
It can be pretty off-putting for women when men in papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) act indecisive and dwell on things.
Going forward, it might be better for you to trust your instincts instead of overthinking things.
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I’m a column writer, so if I were stuck for a topic, I’d probably grin to myself and agree to go on a date for 100,000 yen.
This feels like one of those cases. I have a strong feeling she wouldn’t agree to go that easily even for 100,000 yen, which makes it an interesting story for a column.
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If you weren’t going to accept 10, there was no need for a detailed explanation. It would’ve been better to just say, “No thanks, goodbye.”
Marika
Reading it over again, a lot of it feels pretty creepy.
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Since he was a man who kept making you wait and stringing you along, he may have taken you a little for granted.
I think it’s only natural that you feel you won’t be able to enjoy it.
You probably should have noticed that he was putting on an act by about the third time.
—Akari
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I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that.
If I were you, I wouldn’t go on the date. I probably would have ended the relationship after the second date.
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Thanks for the entertaining question. I actually laughed out loud at the woman’s last-ditch parting shot, lol.
I’d love to hear her side of the story too…
You had another dinner date after offering an allowance of 5, right?
If she then suddenly demanded 10, she was probably just using that as an excuse to turn you down. So I wonder—if you’d agreed to 10, would she have continued seeing you…?
Honestly, I wish you’d asked, “How about we meet in the middle at 8?”—after you’d already decided to turn her down, of course. I wonder if she would’ve replied with a cheerful “Bye-bye!”…
You may already be blocked, but please try messaging her now: “I’m sorry. Honestly, 10 would be difficult for me, but how about 8?” If she says okay, come back with, “Actually, I’ve thought about it, and how about 4 instead?”
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