I don’t understand why my papa always tries to hold my hand or link arms in public. Doesn’t he worry about being seen by someone he knows? He doesn’t even care when we’re near his home or workplace. Also, what do you all say when someone you know sees you? If I said he was a relative or my father, my papa might feel uncomfortable, but I don’t want people to think he’s my boyfriend or that I’m doing papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan).

It’s sweet of you to worry about your papa even though you’re uncomfortable with it. Here’s how I see it: 1) Hand-holding that looks like papa-katsu: - The man is grinning while the woman looks annoyed or uncomfortable - One of them is obviously and unnaturally worried about being watched - Only the woman is being proactive while the man looks nervous and awkward 2) Hand-holding that doesn’t look like papa-katsu: - Both the man and woman look like they’re enjoying themselves - They hold hands naturally and blend in with the people around them, including their overall vibe and fashion When I’m observing people around town, type 1 is what catches my attention. Type 2 doesn’t bother me even if I notice it, because they blend in. I wouldn’t find it strange if they said they were relatives, colleagues, or friends. I think all you need to do is avoid situation 1. Considering your current circumstances, just politely decline if you don’t like it. If the man reaches for your hand without saying anything, simply slip your hand away without saying anything either. As long as you blend in with your surroundings, no one is paying as much attention to you as you think they are(^^) Your clothes are important too. A man in a worn-out, stereotypical office-worker suit and tie, or a woman wearing very revealing clothes, creates nothing but a sense of incongruity. It’s important to create a situation where, even if someone you know sees you holding hands, “He’s a business associate” or “He’s a relative” would be perfectly believable. The more elaborate the excuse, the more obvious it sounds. And don’t hold hands with a man who gives you an uncomfortable feeling.

> I don’t understand the mindset of papas who are always trying to hold hands or link arms in public. I think it depends on the person. People who enjoy physical affection probably just don’t care about being seen. > What do you all say if someone you know sees you? I don’t think many people would actually come up to you on the spot, so you probably don’t need to worry about whether your papa feels uncomfortable. At that point, a relative’s uncle would work just as well.

I don’t understand it either. To begin with, I can’t imagine walking around town with someone I’m in a monthly arrangement with. I feel bad for her. There’s one girl who insists on walking around town together and clings tightly to my arm. She’s incredibly beautiful, so we attract a ton of attention. I really don’t understand what’s going through her mind.

Someone I knew saw me once. She was about 22, so I said, “He’s a client from work.” Technically, that wasn’t a lie—she was actually one of my clients. If the age gap is within 10 years, I call her my wife. I don’t like linking arms, so we don’t do that, but we sometimes hold hands.