I’m a college student, and I can’t get by on less than ¥300,000 a month. I spend about ¥70,000 on fixed expenses (rent, utilities, and phone/internet), ¥100,000 on food, and ¥130,000 on clothes and things like that. Even with this ¥300,000, I feel like I’m living a deprived life. Whenever I get cosmetic procedures or buy something from a luxury brand, I spend around ¥1 million in a month. For now, I try to save about ¥200,000–¥300,000 every month (when I’m living on ¥300,000). I’ve been saving since I was little, so I’ve accumulated over ¥10 million.
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Right now, I’m somehow managing to get by through papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), but if my papas disappeared, I seriously wouldn’t be able to support myself. I could maintain the same lifestyle, but I’d probably have to live off my savings.
Despite my heavy spending, I’m frugal about things like rent and live somewhere inexpensive.
As for food, I binge and purge, so I end up buying and eating huge amounts without realizing it. The money disappears like water, so cutting back is difficult at the moment.
I want cute things, and I can’t stop myself from buying them.
But I’m sure my lifestyle is completely different from that of people my age. When I talk to others, they seem to be struggling and trying to save money. When I think that guys a few years older than me probably only earn ¥200,000–¥300,000 a month, I start thinking, “I’ll never be able to get married. 😭”
It’s not that I only started spending this much because I began papa-katsu. I grew up in a wealthy family, and my mother, father, and siblings all love luxury brands. I’m actually the most modest one in my family. In high school, I had a ¥100,000 allowance and managed within that, but now that I’m in college, ¥100,000 is simply not enough.
At this rate, I’ll only ever be able to marry some older guy with money. I want to marry someone my own age like a normal person. How can I fix my completely warped sense of money?
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂20s👑Universe female member
I’m Saito, a columnist♪
Learn how to be happy even without money.
> Joe Rubicon
> You should try reading *Throw Everything Away* by Yoshihisa Nakano—you have nothing to lose.
Joe, we may actually have crossed paths somewhere without realizing it… (Just saying.)
> Make-Oto
> I understand that giving PJ too much money can distort her sense of money.
I completely agree.
If you want to ruin someone, give them money they don’t need.
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Once your sense of money gets distorted, it isn’t easy to fix.
You’ll need to live without any luxuries at all for at least six months.
If you start making excuses for yourself, thinking, “This much should be fine,” you’ll fail—just like with dieting.
And honestly, if you were getting ¥100,000 a month in allowance when you were in high school, you weren’t exactly living like an average high school student.
Taking home ¥300,000 a month is roughly equivalent to an annual income of ¥6–7 million.
So, as you said, compared with the average income in Japan, there’s a good chance you won’t be able to manage if your papa (a male supporter) is no longer around.
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Sakurako Jinno from the drama *Yamato Nadeshiko* lived a very similar life, I think.
“The one thing I hate most in this world is being poor. I have only one weapon: my beauty. I wonder where all the rich men are.”
“Once I’ve worn an outfit for an important occasion, I never wear it again. That’s a rule. Obviously—I never know where, when, or with whom I might meet someone.”
“No matter how sincere a man is, money is more trustworthy. Money will never betray a woman!”
“Why is it acceptable to choose a man based on his looks or personality, but not based on his money?”
“Clothes are everything to me! They’re my life!”
“A woman sells for the highest price at 27. According to my statistics, 27 is the peak age for selling. Once you go past that, your value starts to drop.”
“Height, looks, and personality are things you’re born with, aren’t they? In the end, they’re a matter of genetics and environment. There are unfair hurdles that no amount of personal effort can overcome.”
“I was still a child, so I didn’t understand what makes a person valuable. Ignorance is frightening, isn’t it? You get distracted by pointless things like a man’s good looks, kindness, or shared interests. In the end, it’s money that makes people happy. Romance and admiration are just extras—ex-tra!”
And so on…
I’m sure the questioner can relate to her.
Just as Sakurako originally intended, I think the best option is to look for a rich man and marry him.
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If you genuinely want to change things, you’ll have to be prepared to live without money. But if you’re thinking, “I’ll somehow manage,” I don’t think anything will change.
I think your only option is to live with your parents and receive financial support from them.
Honestly, the best solution might be to have your father find you a good marriage partner.
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Quit papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) and go back to your parents’ home. You can’t keep living off them forever.
Why not become a shareholder in your father’s company and get by modestly? No one is going to help you.
You probably won’t realize what you need to do until you’re in a crisis.
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Take a chance and read *Zenbu Sutereba* by Yoshihisa Nakano.
If you start reading it in the morning, you’ll finish by noon, and if you put even one thing into practice that afternoon, you’ll be a different person by evening.
Oh—now that I read it back, it sounds like I’m recruiting you for some new religion（笑).
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I think it’s fine to have your parents support you while you’re in college, then get married through an arranged marriage as soon as you graduate.
Marika
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I know that giving PJ girls too much money can warp their sense of finances.
That’s why I’m selective about who I give an allowance of ¥500,000+ per month to. I only offer a generous allowance to girls who can withstand my business boot camp.
I make it clear to them:
“It’s training to help you become independent from me. If you’re not willing to work hard, I’ll probably end things with you before long.”
My former top girl became dependent on my generous allowance and stopped putting effort into her work, so I cut ties with her once. After confirming that she’d reflected on it, we got back together, and she’s now working hard on her business.
I also explained this properly to my next top girl as one of the terms of our arrangement.
I’m a scumbag, but I’d like to think I still have a backbone in my own way. (Do I, really?)
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Men just a few years older than you usually take home less than ¥300,000 a month.
A warped sense of money tends to return to normal once you find yourself without any. So I think it would probably get better if you stopped papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) and lived that way for a few years.
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