Tips
Feb 12, 2022 21:21
9 answers
A～Dまで一通りオファーの経験あり、多くても月１程度でLINEはスケジュール調整のみ、スマートに無理なく長期交際するスタイルです。
Age: 50s
👨 Male
Universe member
I aim for a relationship where we can be honest and talk openly about anything, so I feel that women I see are relatively more likely to tell me when something makes them uncomfortable.
Women observe how a man reacts in his everyday behavior and when they tell him they don’t like something.
Depending on his reaction, if she thinks he might get angry, she’ll probably start keeping things bottled up.
🏅 倶楽部女性のご主人様に潤いを！
Mパパ、永遠の交際継続中！
B1タイプ〜A寄りパパです！
会う度大人は嫌と感じる方………ご相談ください。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe member
It’s often hard to voice your dissatisfaction.
If a woman who has been receiving an allowance from you says she wants to end things, is it because her circumstances have changed, or because she had some dissatisfaction with the arrangement...?
But if her circumstances have simply changed, there’s no need to formally end things—you could just stop seeing each other for a while, right?
Other
I can say things like, “I don’t like it when you do that, so please stop,” as part of a lovers’ quarrel, but I can’t bring up sensitive topics like body odor…
Since you’ve been seeing this woman for several years, I imagine something changed in her lifestyle—perhaps she got married or started dating someone. It can’t be helped. Let her go with your best wishes.
🏅 あなたの味方
お役に立てれば幸いです。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe staff
When I was conducting interviews, I heard a lot of complaints from the women.
Most of them started with, “I can’t say this to him, but…”
And even the complaints they shared with the staff were probably less than one-tenth of what they were actually unhappy about.
So I get the impression that they rarely tell the men directly.
You may be wondering, “Why, after being together for several years?” But if you think back, you may realize there were various things that come to mind.
You may feel that none of them were serious enough to justify breaking up. But what if she had actually been putting up with them for the entire three years?
She may have thought, “I put up with it for three years, but nothing changed, so I’ve decided to end things.”
Once a woman says she wants to break up, she usually won’t change her mind.
That said, the fact that she took the time to have a proper breakup conversation may also mean there wasn’t any specific complaint. Maybe she simply decided it was time to graduate from papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), or perhaps she had always intended to do it for only a few years.
It’s also possible that she found a boyfriend.
I understand that you don’t want to break up, but since she took the trouble to tell you honestly, I think it would be best to part on something like, “You can always come back if you change your mind” (though she probably won’t, haha).
Personally, I think it would look pretty classy if you gave her an allowance of around one million yen as a farewell gift.
You could even give her ten million yen, like that one other respondent did.
Doing so might also help you find closure.
Other
I usually don’t say anything.
If it’s something that’s bothering me in the moment, I’ll mention it right then. For example, “Your voice is a little loud!” or something like that.
Marika
🏅 ４０歳でリアル異世界転生したオッサン l 元金融マン → 現ＡＩ界隈
出張ホストの実技試験合格してるので、対女性への無難な前戯とかマナーに一定の知見あり。
Age: 40s
👨 Male
Universe member
Women tend to think of life in terms of different stages, so the time has come for her to step off the papa-katsu stage.
To put it simply, I’ve actually seen women who used to party nonstop suddenly stop, get married, have children, and settle into domestic life. I’ve also seen professional papa-katsu girls who made their living that way get married, have children, and begin living a family-oriented life.
But what should us older men do in the end?
A man is supposed to live by his own sense of style. We give her the most heartfelt words of gratitude we can manage, along with a little extra allowance, then walk away showing her our sad back. We don’t look back. I think that’s the papa’s code.
🏅 プロおぢ。ほんとはプロパパと名乗りたいけど名乗るほどの実力がない名古屋の汚っさんです。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe member
It’s probably a cost-effectiveness issue.
Maybe the only option is to increase the allowance?
I’m an unattractive older guy, but I offer a generous allowance, so I’ve never once been told they wanted to break things off. I’ve only ever been the one to end things.
It may sound harsh, but for women, “the allowance is all that matters.”
Other
After being together for several years, for this to happen so suddenly… Maybe he found someone else?!
If it were me, I don’t think I’d mention minor frustrations. I might be able to say something if we were as close as a boyfriend and girlfriend, but since the relationship is based on an allowance, I don’t think I’d feel comfortable bringing it up.
Still, if there’s something I’m doing wrong, I’d want him to tell me.
👨 Male
Universe member
I’m not a woman, but…
If she says she wants to end things, then regardless of the reason, I believe the proper etiquette in an exclusive dating club is to graciously let her go.