Lately, when talking with male members, I’ve started to feel like youth is the only thing I have going for me.
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What can I do to become quick-witted and humorous, like you?
For now, I’m thinking of interacting with as many people as possible, learning from their good qualities, and getting more comfortable with conversation. I’d be grateful if you could share anything I should keep in mind or any small tips that might help along the way.
Thank you in advance!
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂20s👑Universe female member
From a man’s perspective, women who are slow on the uptake can be difficult to deal with, but men don’t necessarily expect women to be especially quick-witted or humorous.
That said, if you want to think on your feet more quickly, it’s important to consciously practice doing so in conversation.
And if you want to come up with witty replies, I think you need to cultivate an eagerness to learn broadly and absorb as much knowledge as possible.
Successful men probably also try to learn from the women they date.
Incidentally, I don’t make a conscious effort to give humorous replies on Q&A sites.
But in person, despite having a gentle demeanor, I’m the type who makes cutting remarks with a laugh, and I do have a fair amount of amusing material.
A woman I met recently even told me there was a huge difference between how I seemed when we first met and how I was after dinner.
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I’m Late-Bloomer Taro.
Thanks for complimenting me (←not even close) lol. In return, I’ll share something very important.
Meeting all kinds of people is great, but don’t become their fan. Once you become a fan, you’ll never be more than that person. When you find someone good, you should think about how to surpass them. The questioner wrote “steal,” not “learn,” and I think that’s actually quite insightful. Skills are meant to be “stolen.” But that requires having your own strengths to begin with. You can’t surpass the original by simply imitating someone else. You surpass them by using others as references while refining your own strengths. Above all, whenever you meet someone exceptional, keep the mindset of, “I’m going to surpass this person.” That’s important. Even if you can’t surpass them right away, it’s fine to think, “By the time I reach their current age, I’ll be even further ahead.”
Of course, you can’t say that directly to them or they’ll be offended. So on the surface, it’s fine to say, “I’m a huge fan of yours!” You get close to them that way, observe them carefully, and quietly steal whatever you can. Then, once it’s all over and you’ve completely surpassed them, you can say, “Thanks to that person, I realized so many things and was able to grow.” Treat them like a benefactor, and you’ve got yourself a heartwarming story. That’s how you cleverly get what you want, keep moving forward, and make the most of the situation. Keep it up for ten years, and you can create an overwhelming gap.
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To answer seriously, there’s only one truly smart person among the responders here.
There are plenty of painfully pretentious people who act intelligent by saying things as though they know it all. But I’m a genuine idiot whose entire brain has fallen out, leaving me empty-headed, so I’ve had to stuff myself full of muscle just to survive.
Youth is a weapon in itself. You can’t buy youth with money, so I hope you’ll make the most of it while you can.
There’s also something I’d like to say to the papa-katsu girls who post questions in the anonymous inbox and get completely torn apart.
Don’t let it bother you, even if people gang up on you. After all, the very responders who lecture everyone so arrogantly are usually Carlos Ghosns who can only offer a measly 5 in allowance on a pay-per-meeting basis.
You worked up the courage to ask a question, only to be mocked by a responder? Then send a follow-up and hit back with:
“But aren’t you only offering 5 per meeting, XX? lol”
There’s a saying that beauty is justice, but in papa-katsu, “the allowance is the only thing that matters.”
Whenever I say “the allowance is the only thing that matters,” some people get furious and insist, “It’s not all about money!” But treating women kindly, entertaining them, showing consideration, maintaining a slim waist, getting hair removal, dressing sharply, and taking care of your breath and general cleanliness are all things that should go without saying.
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I originally wanted to “grow old quickly.”
Young, naive women are often looked down on, deceived, exploited—in short, taken advantage of by the people around them.
Society puts young women on a pedestal, while at the same time squeezing everything it can out of them, using them, and consuming them.
I don’t think anyone who hasn’t once been a young woman can truly understand this feeling, but society worships the idea of “girls” while being completely indifferent to the women they become after being flattered and encouraged not to think for themselves as they grow older.
In fact, the way the world praises and exploits young women is so extreme that you might even suspect it wants to mass-produce women like that. That’s why I really hated being young back then.
I believed people were basically good, so I didn’t know to be suspicious. Looking back, there are so many times when I realize, “That person was taking advantage of me.” I repeatedly felt like my youth was being exploited, and I hated it so much that I wanted to grow old as quickly as possible.
Living in a male-dominated society requires a delicate sense of balance. Until you develop it, your self-esteem goes up and down like a roller coaster.
Even so, by working hard every day, taking an interest in what others have to say and learning from them, and overcoming your share of hardships, I think you gradually become an adult woman.
From here on, the harder you try to live earnestly, the more obstacles you’ll probably run into as well. But please live strongly and wisely so that society won’t use or exploit you.
If you do, I’m sure that one day you’ll have a moment when you think, “I’ve become someone whose only asset isn’t my youth anymore.”
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Watch Yoshimoto Shinkigeki and try to identify a few basic formulas for generating laughter.
Then watch some manzai and comedy sketches to find more complex formulas.
Finally, study the ways comedians who are good at recovering from a flop handle those moments.
If a joke lands, great. Even if it falls flat, you’ll learn how to turn it around and still get a laugh.
Once you’ve got that down, there’s nothing to be afraid of.
Experience? No, no—it’s technique.
Everyone has different tastes when it comes to the direction of someone’s sense of humor, but personally, I recommend listening to comedians’ radio shows. Unlike manzai and sketches, they teach you how to create laughter through conversation.
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Realizing that you have nothing but youth is actually a sign that you want to grow, which is a good thing.
Break out of your own shell, try things with an open mind, and understand how pointless society’s common sense, concern about appearances, and pressure to conform really are—then let them go.
If you become rigidly trapped by narrow-minded beliefs, assumptions, and prejudices about how things “should” or “must” be, simply commuting between home and work every day and living a passive life without thinking for yourself, your brain will gradually grow old, and you’ll ultimately become a boring person.
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For now, I think it’s best to start by talking with all kinds of people. As I mentioned earlier regarding class and dignity, try modeling yourself after admirable people. And don’t forget to work hard at your regular job, too.
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I recommend meeting and talking with a wide variety of older men.
Even just having conversations with them can help you absorb all kinds of information. Then, when you talk to other men, I think topics will naturally come to you more easily.
Reading your question made me think of the idea of “knowing that you know nothing.”
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I’m a fan of the other answerers here too. Everyone is so quick-witted, and they’re all funny and kind!
I still have a lot to learn myself, so I’m the one who needs to keep working on it. I’ll look forward to reading everyone else’s answers!
That said, I think you’re already a wonderfully sincere person for feeling that way!
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