Maezawa from the executive office here.
If by “getting her in the mood” you mean becoming intimate, then you’ve already made a mistake by letting six months pass.
I thought making your move by around the third date was the absolute basics, but six months…?
I’m not really sure whether there’s any way to recover from here.
That said, if you met her through Universe, she’s a Type A dating partner, and she’s the kind of woman who might be open to an adult relationship (intimate) with a good person, then I think she may bring it up herself if you simply continue going on dates.
Some women start to feel that, since they’ve been treated so kindly and receiving an allowance, they ought to give something back to such a good person. I think it ultimately depends on whether she’s that kind of person.
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I’m Dai, a male member.
Since you’re in your 50s, it’s rather naïve to think that a young woman would genuinely fall for you.
You should understand that she’s seeing you because you give her an allowance.
That said, some women do occasionally develop genuine feelings, but it’s not something you can deliberately aim for.
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I’m Shingo Lee (Shingori), a columnist.
Rather than your attitude, what matters is not appearing timid through your nonverbal cues. Speak with confidence, and don’t look intimidated when interacting with women.
Be mindful of how you carry yourself so that you come across as relaxed and in control.
It’s also best to keep dates relatively short. In the past, I avoided long dates and would wrap things up after about two hours if nothing physical was going to happen.
People are most satisfied when they’re left wanting just a little more—when they feel they’re almost fulfilled.
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I’m Aya, a female member.
People judge more than 90% of who someone is based on their first impression, so rather than overthinking your communication, it’s more important to start by improving that first impression.
You’ve probably heard of the “Mehrabian principle.”
Appearance and gestures, such as facial expressions and eye contact, account for 55% of the impact we have on others. Information conveyed through the ears—like volume and speaking speed—accounts for 38%, while the actual content of the conversation makes up only 7%.
Of course, I’m not saying conversation isn’t important. But first, you should work on your appearance, gestures, voice volume, and speaking pace so you don’t make others uncomfortable. From there, I think you’ll be more likely to be liked if you work on your inner qualities too, such as making a point of listening carefully to what the other person says.
By the way, the techniques you mentioned, like “dragging out the date” or “not texting,” are meaningless if the other person doesn’t like you.
If a woman you weren’t interested in—say, an unattractive woman more than 20 years older than you—started taking a long time to reply to your messages or acting suggestively, you’d probably just think, “What?” It’s the same thing.
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I’m Flag Maker, a column writer.
By “girlfriend,” do you mean a regular girlfriend—not someone you’re seeing through papa-katsu?
If so, there’s only one option: propose marriage.
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
The moment you start thinking that way, you’ve already been completely defeated. Any clumsy little trick from someone who isn’t used to this will only make things worse. I don’t think you should do that.
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