I’m BB7.
They’re probably taking you for granted—or maybe they’ve just let their guard down.
Why not try messaging them first for once, or act a little distant?
If that’s the end of it, move on to the next one.
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I’m column writer Fuu.
My monthly arrangement partner and I don’t send thank-you emails. Since we see each other regularly, there’s no need.
There was one when he first made the offer, though.
At the end, in the room, we say “Thanks again for today” to each other, and a hug and a kiss are more than enough to make me feel fulfilled.
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I’m Aya, a female member.
In a nutshell, I think they’ve simply gotten too used to it.
I make a point of not coming across that way—or rather, I feel uncomfortable if I don’t show my appreciation, so I always send a message after parting ways. But some women may think, “I don’t need to bother with this papa (male supporter),” and skip the thank-you message.
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Maezawa from the CEO’s Office here.
If this only started happening recently, then one possibility is:
① She’s started feeling dissatisfied with you.
Maybe she initially thought you were a good person, but as she got to know you, she began noticing sides of you she didn’t like. Or perhaps she received an offer from someone else with a higher allowance and has started thinking that it would be fine to eventually part ways with you.
To figure out which it is, I think you should try to find out what she’s becoming dissatisfied with.
It may also be worth taking a look at your own behavior:
- Are you being too possessive?
- Are you making unreasonable demands?
- Are you assuming that certain things are okay just because you’re paying her an allowance?
You could also casually try to find out whether she’s unhappy with the allowance.
Another possibility is:
② She stopped saying it because you’ve become closer.
If that’s the case, it could be a sign that you’ve grown comfortable with each other, so I don’t think you need to worry too much.
But if it still bothers you, you could say something like:
“It’s nice when someone thanks you even for the little things, isn’t it?”
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I’m Rin, a female SALON member.
I can’t imagine not expressing my thanks, so I end up wondering whether it simply doesn’t matter to them.
Maybe they were extremely busy afterward and forgot…but I still can’t imagine being so busy that you can’t even send one thank-you email.
If I felt someone wasn’t worth emailing, I might not contact them either. Maybe they see you as someone they’ll reply to if you reach out, but won’t contact on their own?
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My favorite girl doesn’t reply like that.
The ones I only see occasionally always send a proper reply right away, though…
In your case, maybe she’s letting her guard down because you’ve become closer. If she’s always been that way, it wouldn’t bother me, but since it’s a change, I can understand why you’re a little concerned…
With family, a partner, a best friend, or someone who isn’t used to dating clubs, you wouldn’t get that kind of response either—and they wouldn’t see you off while standing up, for example.
I don’t think you need to worry about it that much.
If everything is always perfectly formal, it can feel a little too much like papa-katsu… It starts to feel like a job.
—Paper Airplane
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
For better or worse, maybe she’s just gotten used to you?
Some women don’t send a thank-you message from the beginning, but I take that to mean they’re simply not very attentive when it comes to LINE. I’m fine with maintaining that kind of relationship with women who aren’t frequent texters, so I don’t read too much into it.
If a woman who was originally very attentive suddenly stops messaging—or starts doing it more often—I’ll say something like, “You’ve been letting your guard down lately.”
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