Do men feel sad thinking, “She’s only meeting me reluctantly because I give her an allowance…”?
This content is machine-translated.
I laugh a lot and try to make things enjoyable so they won’t feel that way. Maybe because of that, I often end up with men developing serious feelings for me, which can be really difficult.
At the same time, being cold to them doesn’t feel right either…
I’m column writer Fuu.
I think it’s wonderful that you’re making an effort not to make the other person feel that way. You’re right that acting cold isn’t the answer, either.
From now on, try to observe your partners carefully and:
- Choose a papa (a male supporter) who isn’t looking for a serious romantic relationship in the first place.
- If someone seems likely to develop serious feelings, set boundaries when necessary and don’t go too far.
It may be difficult, but hopefully, through trial and error, you’ll become better at judging people.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I’m BB7.
I’m not really sure what the difference is between being genuinely in love and simply liking someone.
If you’re not having even the slightest bit of fun, meeting them reluctantly, and desperately forcing yourself to enjoy it, wouldn’t it be better to stop seeing them?
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I’m not a young girl but an older woman, and I feel the same way.
I genuinely enjoy the time we spend together, and things wouldn’t last with someone I didn’t enjoy being around. So sometimes I really do fall in love, and in the past, the other person often got the wrong idea about my feelings.
These days, I feel happy surrounded by people who seem to strike a nice balance.
Marika
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
Giving women an allowance is how you prevent them from falling for you. It’s the opposite—literally the opposite.
Last week, a Type A girl asked me to date her without an allowance, and I suddenly thought of Win-san. So I’m trying to persuade her to let me cover the cost somehow:
“I’d like to rent a place for you. You wanted to live on your own, right?”
She really doesn’t want to accept an allowance, so I went with Win-san’s approach instead. Long live anonymous Q&A boxes! m(｡>__<｡)m
She keeps pressing me with questions like, “How many times a month will you come to the apartment?” and it’s got me stumped. But even while feeling困惑, I’m kind of happy too. And for some reason, I keep thinking that I’ve gotten one step closer to being like Win-san. I’m enjoying papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) while having these completely incomprehensible thoughts.
—A loser of a man
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I’m Flag Maker, a column writer.
I know you’re meeting me for the allowance, but I’ll do my best not to make you feel uncomfortable. I’m not expecting you to fall genuinely in love with me, though.
Let’s both do our best.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
Making an effort not to make the other person uncomfortable and to ensure you both have a good time is fundamental, I believe.
You’re wonderful for someone so young.
Akari
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I’m Kazu, a male member.
No, it doesn’t.
I only pursue relationships with women who I assume have chosen me as someone they want to continue seeing, so I don’t believe that “receiving an allowance = doing it reluctantly.”
Naturally, I also make an effort not to become someone the woman dislikes, so that she’ll choose me for an ongoing relationship.
If she’s doing it reluctantly just for the money, wouldn’t that be an even worse mindset than that of an average sex worker?
I also avoid offering an excessively generous allowance, so that money doesn’t conceal the woman’s reluctance.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
