Thank you for your answer.
Following your advice, I told him, “Let’s keep that kind of thing to the room,” and then, on the way home from dinner last time, he suddenly said, “Let’s stay overnight tonight.”
I assume it was because he can’t kiss me anywhere but in a room. Of course, since it was so sudden, I turned him down that day.
We’re planning to have lunch at a hotel restaurant tomorrow, but now I’m worried about what to do if he invites me to a room afterward…
If he does ask me, how should I turn him down?
I don’t want things to lead to an adult relationship (intimate) out of the blue with no plans in advance. I’d like him to tell me beforehand.
I’m in Seattle.
Turning him down for that is honestly a little harsh on the guy.
You should message him right away and ask upfront: “How far are we going next time, and how much will the allowance be?” If he says that kills the mood, then just chalk it up to not being meant to be.
If you can keep stringing him along with dinner-only dates after this, you’re a genius.
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I’m Osaka, a male member.
The “French-kissing monster” bit was funny, but honestly, I’m not sure I understand the person asking the question either lol.
You’ve gone on several dates, and French-kissing seems to be how he’s expressing his intentions. But you only want dinner, right? Wouldn’t that make you Type A?
As long as he’s saying things like, “Let’s do that in a room,” isn’t he straightforwardly asking you to go to a room with him for some French-kissing? At the very least, I find it pretty strange that you’d accept the next date but ask for advice on how to turn him down if it’s dinner only. That just doesn’t seem right to me.
I’m not exactly supporting the French-kissing, lol. But would it be okay if he said beforehand, in a message or something, “I’ll invite you to a room next time”? That’s the part I can’t quite wrap my head around.
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Why not ask in advance, “What are your plans after dinner?”
Actually, it sounds like this is someone you’re seeing regularly, but is a C-type arrangement really okay with him?
Marika
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I’m Rin, a female member of SALON.
If you want to turn down a last-minute invitation, you could say something like, “I have plans afterward…” or “I thought we were only having dinner today, so I’m not mentally prepared for that.”
If he invited you on short notice last time too, would it be possible for you to go to dinner already expecting that? Or is it that you don’t want an adult relationship (intimate) with him?
If that’s not the case and you simply want him to let you know beforehand, why not tell him that directly?
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
I think you should simply say, “I don’t want things to suddenly turn into an adult relationship on the spur of the moment without any plans. I’d like you to let me know beforehand.”
You already turned down “Let’s stay overnight tonight” once in the same way, didn’t you?
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