This is about something that happened with a man who offered to meet me a little while ago.
Since we met, he hasn’t really reached out proactively, and only replies when I contact him.
That said, his replies aren’t cold or anything.
The other day, I worked up the courage to tell him that I’d like to see him again sometime soon, and he replied, “I don’t mind meeting, but there won’t be any allowance.”
I don’t know whether he felt I wasn’t worth giving an allowance to, but I had viewed him favorably, at least, so I decided to ask him something that had been on my mind.
I asked, “When men offer to meet women through the club, is it assumed from the start that it’s going to be a transactional relationship?”
He replied, “Of course. That’s the premise.”
Is this considered normal at these clubs?
I understand that people have different ways of thinking, and that not every person who makes an offer will necessarily remain in a long-term relationship with you.
Still, just because I’m Type C doesn’t mean I want to immediately have a relationship beyond dinner with just anyone.
I shared time with him beyond dinner because I hoped our relationship might continue, at least to some extent.
Honestly, I was the one who brought it up, but hearing him respond with the words “transactional relationship” really upset me.
Do many men who offer to meet Type C women think this way?
If I’m looking for someone with whom I can maintain a long-term relationship, should I switch to Type B?
Maezawa from the CEO’s Office will answer as well.
I’m sorry to say this to the person who asked the question.
There are men who join Universe Club simply because they want to be with various women, much like going to adult entertainment establishments.
So, as a general rule, they meet a woman once and then move on.
If they hit it off, they may meet her several more times (I imagine they operate similarly when visiting adult entertainment venues—if they find someone they like, they request her again a few times).
Universe Club does not regulate this aspect.
As long as men follow the rules—or properly pay the agreed compensation—they are free to use the service normally.
That’s why, when a woman is invited to a hotel after dinner, it would be a good idea to ask whether he is looking for a long-term relationship.
However, many men will say they are considering something long-term, since you cannot really know until you become intimate—and, of course, that is what they want anyway. It’s easy to imagine them giving that answer.
Rather than asking directly, you need to draw out his views on relationships during the conversation.
If you get the impression that he wants to be with various women, it’s perfectly fine to decline any relationship after dinner, even with a C arrangement.
(By the way, you also have the right to decline with a D arrangement. This isn’t an adult entertainment service.)
If that feels too difficult, choosing B will likely mean encountering more men who are looking for a long-term relationship.
(That’s only a matter of probability, so there will still be men who are only interested in one meeting—but the number should be considerably lower.)
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It’s Seattle.
It seems you simply weren’t a good match for the questioner. There are definitely people who will be a better fit, so let’s look elsewhere.
There’s even a female respondent from Salon here. Amazing.
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I’m a male member—a loser.
Judging from this question alone, the safest answer would be: “Forget about that man immediately and move on.”
However:
- Someone who fell in love with his girlfriend’s mother and eventually married her
- Someone who can only have sex with his father
- A woman who is dating her younger brother
- A woman with a fetish for being raped by a man she absolutely hates
These are all real-life examples I know.
*Mac-san, please add some of your own examples.*
An unbelievable world exists all around us. People with no experience simply can’t see it—that’s what you call having a narrow perspective.
Nothing shuts down future possibilities more than fixed ideas.
It’s something you should never do in business.
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Nice to meet you. I’m Rin, a female salon member, and I’ll be answering questions here. Thank you for having me.
That must be upsetting. It’s lonely when a man you liked doesn’t contact you.
If you genuinely want to see him even without an allowance, then you should go ahead and meet him. But if you feel that seeing him only makes sense with an allowance, it may be better to wait for another man.
I don’t think being Type B or Type C really has much to do with it.
I hope you have a wonderful encounter!
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Don’t worry about that man. I think it’s fine to stick with Type C.
Since women are the ones receiving the allowance, they’ll continue seeing someone as long as he’s within their acceptable range.
But men are the ones giving the money, so unless she’s exceptional, they generally won’t want to meet again.
That’s all there is to it.
—Paper Airplane
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I’m Dai, a male member.
Even if a man’s dating style is a transactional relationship, if he wants to keep seeing you, he’ll continue the relationship while providing an allowance.
If he tells you there won’t be an allowance for the second meeting, you should take that as a sign that he doesn’t want to continue seeing you.
Also, it’s not simply a matter of whether Type B relationships last longer than Type C relationships.
Even if you choose Type B, there’s still a good chance things may end after the relationship develops into an adult relationship (intimate).
A lot of it comes down to luck, so I think the best approach is to date several men and build a relationship with someone whose views are close to your own.
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I’m Taro, a male member.
First of all, I think the person asking the question is 100% right. C-type is perfectly fine too.
From a man’s perspective, I can understand why some men think that way. Men provide an allowance, after all. Of course, I understand that it’s different from a commercial sex service, but I can also understand the mindset of expecting something special in return for giving an allowance. I’ve met women who were genuinely nice, and whom I might have dated if we’d met under ordinary circumstances, but when viewed as an allowance-based relationship, I found myself thinking, “Hmm, this isn’t quite it…” To be frank, I suspect either her appearance or the quality of the intimacy was an issue for him.
There are all kinds of people at dating clubs, so I do think you have to meet a certain number of people before finding someone compatible. You can also learn things through intimacy, so if C-type is acceptable to you, why not stay with it? If you switch to B-type, you may instead attract clingy, genuinely lovestruck types, so I suppose it comes down to which you prefer.
As far as the chances of meeting someone for a long-term arrangement go, I don’t think there’s much difference between C and B. I make offers to both types, and when things continue, they continue regardless of the type.
P.S. I had the exact opposite opinion from Marika! Sorry（笑）
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That makes no sense.
I wonder why she even registered with a dating club.
Since anything after the second meeting is just up to the two of you, if you’re willing to continue seeing her without an allowance, you can agree to it. If not, you can simply decline.
As for whether it’s normal, I’d say not really.
It’s not a matter of whether she’s a B or C type.
Marika
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