At first, I mainly made offers to women around 30, but gradually I’ve started focusing more on younger women, around 20. I’m in my 40s, and no matter how young I feel, I’m still an older man. When going on dates or spending time with women around 20, I’d appreciate any advice on things I should be careful about so they don’t dislike me.
I’m Saito, a column writer♪
I’m in my 40s too, just like you, and I mainly go on dates with women in their 20s.
① I don’t travel around much outdoors with women.
I stick to taxis, chauffeured cars, or my own car.
② I’m careful about bad breath and body odor.
If you work out at the gym an hour before meeting and spend some time in a chlorinated pool, you won’t smell much.
③ Outside of intimate moments, I don’t touch them or let myself be touched. Haha.
④ I don’t keep them tied up for long periods of time.
⑤ I don’t brag.
If you want to show off, by all means, express it through the allowance.
I actually laughed while writing this myself.
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I’m Rula, a male UC member and a member of the new salon.
Like the other respondents, I believe looking clean and carrying yourself with confidence are essential.
I’d also add that I try to avoid “food prejudice” and “experience prejudice”—in other words, I make an effort not to dismiss things I haven’t tried.
When you date young women in their twenties, you’ll often hear about things from worlds you know nothing about—trendy foods, movies, books, and so on. Rather than automatically deciding I won’t like them, I make a point of trying them at least once.
If I enjoy something, I say, “That was delicious,” and if I don’t, I honestly say, “It just wasn’t for me.”
Even if I think something tastes bad, I don’t feel obligated to say, “Yeah… i-it was delicious…” just because a woman introduced it to me. Under my personal rules, that’s an absolute no-go（笑）. Saying something I don’t really mean just to please the other person is, in my view, being ingratiating.
If you engage with each other naturally, even your differences can become a source of laughter and make for an enjoyable date.
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I’m BB7, a male member.
Since I’m in my 50s, women in their 20s feel almost like daughters to me. I sometimes find myself wanting to lecture them from a superior position, but that’s definitely a no-go.
Instead, I think it’s better to listen, acknowledge their own thoughts, and then offer a bit of mature advice after complimenting them.
Stories like “When I was young…” are rarely interesting to them. They may even mistake them for bragging and be put off, so I avoid that too.
Being well-groomed is essential, as are your physique and overall appearance, as well as your scent and body odor. Nose hair, ear hair, and body hair growing in strange places are completely out of the question.
(Unwanted hair tends to grow more as you get older.)
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I’m a man in my 60s who’s still trying to find his way.
If you keep a youthful mindset and things are continuing with the women around 20 you’re currently seeing, I think it’s fine to just be yourself.
I also see several women around that age, but I don’t force myself to match their interests or try too hard to win them over.
If there’s something I don’t know, I simply admit it, and we teach and ask each other about things. As a result, I’m told I’m incredibly easy to talk to… haha.
So above all, avoid talking down to them. Many of them are probably still university students, but offer advice from an adult’s perspective—while still considering things from their point of view.
If I had to add one thing, it would be to have the patience not to rush them into an adult relationship (intimate).
If you get impatient about that, you’ll seem no different from an overeager young guy. You’ll just come across as a strange older man pressuring them with money, and I doubt things will last.
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I’m だて◎ゆめ, a male member.
I tend to feel the same way as you do.
Younger women generally look more appealing, though that’s only based on appearance. It would be even better if their personality matched—but I suppose that’s asking for too much.
> If there’s anything I should be careful about so I don’t turn them off,
I’d say what people commonly call “cleanliness” or good grooming.
Also, take the time to genuinely engage with the person you’re seeing.
Those are the two things I place the most importance on.
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