I used to be a civil servant and was doing fairly well.
Now I’m self-employed and work from home, so I have a lot of freedom. There’s no bullying here. Starting your own business or working from home can be really enjoyable.
P.S.
Katase-san, you put a lot of effort into writing this, so let’s publish it.
P.P.S.
Thanks for publishing it.
First of all, there’s no need to jump to the conclusion that “being bullied both during the day and at night means there’s something wrong with your character.” Unfortunately, people who stand out—especially those with a glamorous presence or who are seen as popular and attention-grabbing—are more likely to become targets of envy and hostility. I think this has less to do with your personality and more to do with having traits that make you stand out in a group.
I’m not exactly a beauty myself, but for some reason I’ve often ended up standing out, and since I was young, I’ve frequently been the target of envy, snide remarks, and gossip. At first, I would wonder, “Why is this happening?” and “Is it my fault?” But then, at some point, I realized something:
There’s no such thing as someone who is liked by absolutely everyone.
The more you try to be liked by everyone, the more painful it becomes. On the other hand, if you’re loved by the people you truly care about and by those who appreciate you, that alone is enough to make life enjoyable. Once you start enjoying your own life, you somehow gain enough distance to look at envy and bullying and think, “Oh, here we go again.”
It makes perfect sense that you felt more comfortable working at night. In the nightlife world, honest feelings tend to matter more than appearances, so the standards for evaluation are often clearer. Even when envy exists, there are many environments where the owner or someone higher up will plainly say, “That’s just jealousy.” Daytime workplaces, by contrast, can make emotions harder to read and may be more prone to covert, malicious behavior.
To be honest, there’s no line of work completely free of bullying. However, there are environments where it’s less likely to occur.
Jobs with small teams and a high degree of individual autonomy, positions with clearly defined responsibilities and results, and workplaces where skills and performance matter more than hierarchy tend to have fewer conflicts. Jobs where you can maintain a comfortable distance—where you don’t have to be friends with everyone or get too deeply involved—can also be easier on your mental well-being.
Lastly, just one thing.
A place where you feel “I’m having fun” and “I can be myself” is not wrong in any way. You don’t need to wear yourself down trying too hard to fit someone else’s values. Please don’t blame yourself too much, and try making choices based on where you feel most comfortable.
P.S.
Maezawa-san, I answered without realizing you had hidden it. I’m sorry for the trouble.
Seattle-san, thank you for your concern.
When a few people get together, jealousy and bullying are pretty much inevitable. It’s even more true if you’re beautiful!
That’s just how people are. Once you accept that, you need to become thick-skinned and avoid showing that you’ve been hurt.
