I’d like advice on whether to tell my fiancé how much I have saved.

Thank you for your question! If you saved up little by little from your New Year’s gift money and part-time job earnings when you were younger or a student, then I don’t think it’s an entirely unrealistic amount♪ Universe Club Osaka Tohno

I don’t think there’s any need to disclose how much you have in savings. Even if you won a large sum in the lottery, it’s generally recommended not to casually tell people about it. This is no different. By the way, there could be many reasons why someone’s savings are disproportionately high compared with their income. Their parents may have been saving money for them since they were a child, or they may have made a fortune through stocks, investments, cryptocurrency, or FX trading. Conversely, some people earn a lot but have no savings at all. Everyone’s circumstances are different.

After marriage, all earnings become marital property, but anything you own before marriage remains your separate property. If it were me, I’d disclose as little as possible. From your post, it sounds like you don’t know how much the man has in savings, right? Discuss the wedding and new home budget with him and find out how much he has saved. If he has ¥3 million, tell him that you also have ¥3 million and that you’ll contribute the same amount toward the wedding expenses. That way, even in the worst-case scenario of a divorce, you’d get half of the marital assets back, lol. As for the rest of your savings, keep it safely in a separate personal account and don’t mention it. If you’re the kind of person who can do that, I think it would be best.

I’m not sure how helpful this will be, but here’s my experience. When I got engaged, I didn’t know how much my wife had saved, and I don’t think I was particularly interested either (it was a long time ago, so I don’t remember clearly). A few years after we got married, I decided to go independent and start my own business. Things went relatively smoothly at first, but five years later, we hit a crisis. I started scrambling to raise funds, and I was told I could get additional financing if I sold all the real estate I owned personally. In the end, I didn’t have to sell it. My wife offered to lend me the money instead (laughs). I knew she had saved a fair amount, but I never imagined it would be a nine-figure sum. What I’m trying to say is that, whatever method you use, it may be better to keep quiet about it—and be there to help when the time comes. I feel like husbands tend to work harder when they don’t know. I realize this is probably none of my business, but let me offer just a little more advice. You seem to have a talent for saving money. Perhaps you’ve made good use of papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan). First, let me clarify that what I’m about to say isn’t meant sarcastically. A common trap for people who are good at saving is that many of them don’t know how to use the money once they’ve accumulated it. I hope you’ll take this opportunity to think about how to use your savings, too. I’m not saying you should go on a spending spree, nor am I saying you should invest it—that depends on the individual. But why not think about what’s right for you as you prepare to get married? You’ve managed to save so well, so I’m sure you can do it!

I’ve never been interested in how much money the woman I’m seeing has saved. A bankbook feels even more private than a phone. Personally, I think she should disclose any debts, including student loans, but a man who asks about her savings from the outset makes me wonder if he’s already counting on his future spouse’s assets. If you’re worried about someone looking at your bankbook, you could switch to an account that doesn’t issue one. And if they somehow find out your balance, you could just say it’s an inheritance.

You’re the person who posted the question here, right? I looked up the average savings for single-person households in their 20s, and it was ¥1.76 million. If it were me, I’d keep around ¥3 million in an ordinary bank account and move the rest into a brokerage account. Brokerage accounts don’t come with a passbook, and if someone happened to find out about it, you could simply say, “I made some money on stocks once,” so I think that would work well. By the way, when getting married, if your partner is the kind of man who’s careless with money, it might be a good idea to keep his bankbook and put him on an allowance system. That way, even if he wanted to cheat, he wouldn’t have enough spending money to do it. Of course, he wouldn’t be able to do papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) either. But these days, women work too, so perhaps most couples manage their own money separately and don’t show each other their finances? Generally speaking, when getting married, people probably care more about whether their partner has any debt than how much they have saved. It’s not a particularly interesting or glamorous question, and as for whether it’s actually related to papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), it is if you consider it a question about what to do with the money saved through papa-katsu. Still, you might get a wider range of opinions by asking on a site like Yahoo! Answers.

If you can save around ¥2.43 million a year, you’ll have roughly ¥17 million after seven years. So, for example, if you received support from your parents, it doesn’t seem like an impossible amount to save for someone who’s frugal. I think you should decide for yourself whether to mention your savings, but does it feel like you’re expected to give a specific figure? If not, saying something like “about average” might be perfectly fine.