I often see questions from people struggling because their papa (a male supporter) takes a long time to finish, and I have the same problem. I’ve heard of a product called Tenga for men’s self-pleasure. Do you think preparing one and using it would help him finish? I’m also worried he might think I’m too experienced or that I seem like a professional.

I’d like you to ask your papa about this, but he’s spending money to have sex with a real woman rather than masturbating, so I think he’d probably dislike using a Tenga. If he absolutely can’t—or doesn’t want to—be with you, then break things off. Or, like me, try to finish a little sooner lol. There are also papas who help you finish with foreplay first and get you really wet before penetration, even if you have trouble finishing. If you have a reason you can’t break up with him, try pretending to finish, moan a little more than usual, and do your best to act like you’re enjoying it. How about sexy lingerie, or talking with him about a costume he likes—maybe cosplay or a school uniform? Try finding his favorite positions and angles, be more proactive with things like 69 or oral, and make it more exciting. It may be difficult, but give it a try. Personally, what satisfies me most is seeing my partner enjoy herself. There’s probably some lip service involved too, but he says things like: “I wanted to see you.” “I wanted to hold you.” “I finish right away when I’m with Fuu.” “We’re incredibly compatible. It feels so good.” And then comes a really tight hug and a deep kiss. My monthly-arrangement papas usually switch right into the mood as soon as we enter the room. Sorry for bragging… I know a lot of it is probably just lip service too… They’ve got me wrapped around their fingers, though…

There’s something like an “on switch” for me. To put it more technically, I have certain erogenous zones that I’m especially vulnerable to if someone focuses on them. Or maybe it’s more about being turned on by a particular situation or cosplay. There are certain ways of being approached that really work on me. For example, I had what you might call a successful experience of having my virginity taken by an older woman, so I can get going right away in a similar situation. I also get excited by things like cross-dressing or wearing women’s underwear, and there are certain outfits that do it for me—or things a woman dressed a certain way could say that would get me going immediately. This works much like addiction or dependency. It can lead to things like being unable to stop groping people or shoplifting. Once you’ve experienced pleasure in a particular situation, you become like Pavlov’s dog, and all sorts of associated images and memories start coming to mind. Why not try interviewing your partner about their preferences, or investigating them with the aim of identifying their weak points for your own protection? I think you’re just not being creative enough.

First of all, who exactly is suffering here? Now, suppose you have a boyfriend you absolutely love, but you have trouble reaching orgasm during sex with him. If he used a toy to help you climax quickly, would you be satisfied? It seems to me that this is really a lack of communication. Even if something is difficult to bring up at the beginning of a relationship, I think being in a relationship means gradually working through those issues together.

It depends on the man’s personality, the kind of rapport you usually have with him, and how you bring it up.