I met with a papa (a male supporter) several times who wanted a long-term monthly arrangement, but I got tired of how controlling he was.
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He wanted me to make sure I didn’t receive offers from other men, stop seeing anyone I had met before, and avoid going anywhere privately where other men might be, among other things.
I’m single, while he’s married. I usually get offers from around three to five men a month.
With this papa, it wasn’t even a monthly arrangement—it was an adult relationship (intimate) for ¥50,000 pay-per-meeting—and honestly, I had no feelings for him at all. He’s neither my type looks-wise nor personality-wise. He seemed to feel the exact opposite about me.
I didn’t have the energy to accommodate someone so controlling, jealous, and clingy, so I told him we were finished and felt a huge weight lifted off my shoulders.
I might have been willing to put up with it if the terms had been better, but how do other women in papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) deal with controlling papas?
I’ve already left the club. Should I have lied and said I had no contact whatsoever with any men other than my papa? Do women keep claiming they’re single even when they have a boyfriend or husband?
I’d appreciate any advice.
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂Not stated👑Universe female member
If the terms are good and telling a lie would make the other person happy and help things work out, then yes, there are situations where I would do that.
But I don’t want to date someone who isn’t my type or who makes me feel stressed when we’re together, so I won’t force myself to see someone or lie just to keep things going.
I have several papas, but I don’t go out of my way to mention that there are others. They all seem to assume they’re the only one, so I just let them believe that.
Marika
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You’re probably tired of being controlled, but as you said yourself, isn’t the truth that you could have kept trying if the terms had been better?
It may be obvious, but relationships continue when the various factors involved balance each other out, with some pros and cons.
The same goes for marriage and other relationships.
When it comes to looks, personality, and terms, you come across as someone who’s straightforward and places the greatest importance on the terms.
You probably aren’t in a hurry because you still receive a reasonable number of offers. However, offers generally decrease as more time passes after you register.
It’s important to decide early on what you’re willing to compromise on.
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Why complain about individual clients when you’re bringing in three to five new ones a month?
Basically, does that mean the people who keep coming back are all like that? If so, that’s entirely a flaw in your strategy.
If you don’t have feelings for them, you should build a relationship you can continue while keeping things light and matter-of-fact. Aren’t you telling lies that give them the wrong idea?
“Thank you. I really like you, big brother. Come request me again sometime~”
That’s what a delivery escort who let me have H said. Nice, right? Positive, but not clingy. I think that’s the kind of approach you should aim for.
I asked a girl who’s still working in the adult industry, and she said her ratio was about half repeat customers and half new customers. Maybe you should start by aiming for something around there.
Good luck. Though what do I know?
Taro
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Relationships can be complicated, can’t they?
To start with, it’s best to date someone you feel comfortable seeing without forcing anything. As you gradually get used to each other, I’m sure you’ll be able to build a good relationship.
Take it easy and just be yourself!
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