About allowances

I want to give as much as possible and spend as much time together as possible. Pretty normal, right? But unless she says she wants to stay longer, I don’t spend that much time together.

If you’re no longer satisfied with the arrangement and there’s someone better out there, I think you should stop dragging it out and break things off. That said, it’s also true that some men will shy away from women they see as jaded or too experienced with papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan). You could move on to a papa (a male supporter) who pays a generous (well-paying) allowance and meets your expectations, while your current papa could move on to a newly registered woman who isn’t jaded and won’t complain even if the allowance is low-paying. If you weren’t able to build a relationship that went beyond that, then this should let everyone part ways amicably. Marika

In cases like that, she may say, “I already get plenty of allowance from my other papas, so you don’t need to give me any.” Basically, it’s easier for her because she doesn’t have to worry about anything. If she receives even a small allowance, she has to make a certain effort with her makeup, clothes, and behavior, so in your case, it may end up feeling half-hearted. Whether it’s papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), the adult entertainment industry, or men’s esthetics, popular women know how to find healthy outlets for all the stress that comes with it. I think not receiving an allowance is what allows it to become genuine comfort and stress relief—and helps them build good relationships with generous (well-paying) papas and regular customers.

When will you realize how foolish it is to ask questions framed as “What do men…” or “What do women…”? Everyone feels differently, and it also depends on the person they’re with. Besides, I don’t think people’s feelings can be summed up so simply as “I want to spend as much time together as possible for as little money as possible.” You yourself have gone on for 17 lines about how you feel. And if you’re asking whether I want to “spend as much time together as possible for as little money as possible,” the answer is no. As for keeping costs low, I’ve set the allowance at 50,000 yen, and I have no intention of lowering it. Sometimes a woman says she would be satisfied with 30,000 yen when we discuss the allowance, but I still give her 50,000. If she asks for more than 50,000—say, 60,000—I turn her down. There are also days when a woman says she doesn’t need an allowance, but if I don’t feel that’s a reason not to give her one, I still do. Even with the same woman, the length of our dates varies considerably from day to day. Generally speaking, with A, whom I have fewer things in common with, we often eat, have sex, and part ways after about three hours. With B, whom I never run out of things to talk about, we eat, chat for a while, have sex, and usually spend about six hours together. C likes golf, so sometimes we play golf together, go out to eat afterward, have sex, and spend around 14 hours together. On days when we don’t play golf, we often part ways after about four hours. They all receive the same allowance. The point is, I don’t think about the time at all. Your dating partner may think differently, but that’s how I am. So in your case, it’s not that your papa (a male supporter) won some strategic victory, nor that you’ve matured. You’ve simply started calculating things on an hourly basis. Whatever is bothering you, if you’re unhappy, why not look for another papa who pays better by the hour?