I’ve been seeing a low-paying papa (once every two months) for the past two years, and he’s suggested that we go on a one-week trip abroad together. I’d love to go, but he said, “I’m sorry, but I’ll need your personal information so I can book the tickets, mail them to you, and take care of a few other things.”

I believe the only information needed to book an overseas trip is the questioner’s full name, written in Roman letters exactly as it appears on their passport. Even a single incorrect character can prevent them from boarding the plane. They may also need their age, though. Some travel agencies ask for the other person’s address when making the booking, but if you ask, “Is it okay to provide only the representative’s address?” they’ll usually say that’s fine. You probably don’t actually need to provide the passport number or expiration date either, though I think it’s reasonable to share that much. There are also travel agencies that say you don’t need to provide those details, but I believe they make it clear that they won’t be responsible if you’re unable to board the plane as a result. (For example, when traveling to a country that requires your passport to be valid for at least three months, the traveler could make a mistake themselves.) Also, since the tickets are electronic, the only things they would send are probably something like a tour sticker or a small booklet. So I don’t think there would be any problem with simply having the other person hand those over at the airport. In this case, it’s also possible that they’re asking because they want to use this opportunity to find out your personal information, so their intentions may be important. On the other hand, they could simply be inexperienced with overseas travel and passing along whatever the travel agency tells them. If it’s the latter, explaining the situation might convince them. But if it’s the former, things could become quite difficult. So it might be safest to say something like, “I think I’ll pass this time.”

When I open the refrigerator, I see rows of delicious-looking side dishes… But when I look closer, each one has a child’s name written on it. And whenever they find something with “Papa” on it, they say, “Papa can’t have this” or “Papa, don’t eat it.” I’m Paper Airplane, and I’m only ever given the leftovers. I can’t think of a good line or a good way to explain it. It’s a mystery why one person can’t teach, while the other won’t teach. Neither of you makes any sense?? And this is a relationship that only happens once every two months… It just feels like you’re both simply taking advantage of whatever is convenient for you. I think you’d be better off going with someone you actually want to spend every day with.

Wow, two years already… If it were me, I might feel it’s probably okay to tell him by now. I actually shared mine recently when he was booking my plane ticket. Since you’re in your 30s, I’m not sure whether you’re single or married. If you’re single like me, it’s manageable, but if you’re married with children, it could become complicated. Wouldn’t it work for you to have him give you the ticket on the day of the trip? Since an address and name are required to book it, you could buy the ticket yourself and have him reimburse you afterward. He might be a little annoyed, though…

I’ve never had something kept from me, nor have I ever had a low-paying papa, so this is just speculation. But thinking, “Wow, that’s quite a level of distance and trust,” I feel that no matter how it was said to me, I’d probably start fading out of the relationship. That’s also the impression I got from the other answers. For the record, I’m not what most people would consider a good papa (a supportive one). I know their personal information, we spend a lot of time together, there’s no real sense of it being transactional, and I also hide the fact that I’m seeing multiple people. That said, based on Kazu’s answer, they may simply be a liar, so you might want to consider whether they’re really worthy of your trust. I also hide the fact that I’m seeing multiple people, so I’m a liar too. But if you’re going to lie, I think you should make absolutely sure you don’t get caught—and if you’re going to lie to me, I’d rather you stick to it. Once a lie is exposed, my feelings cool off instantly.

Hmm, that’s a pretty classic move lol How about this? “I’m a little uneasy about having such an important ticket mailed to me, so I’d rather pick it up in person. Let’s go on a date before your trip ♡” A good papa should get the hint. If that doesn’t work, just tell him clearly, “I can’t give you my address.” —It’s Me >> Early No, no—he’s an incredibly good papa! He knows my personal information too → because he trusts me We spend a lot of time together and it doesn’t feel transactional at all → because that’s what makes it comfortable He’s even hiding the fact that he’s seeing multiple women → because keeping it hidden is a form of kindness What matters is 100% how the woman feels about it(^^)

I think the way to avoid making someone feel bad is to fulfill what they want. People may feel upset when their wishes aren’t granted. So there’s no way to tell someone you can’t fulfill their request without making them feel at least somewhat disappointed. For example, even if you have a reasonable reason for not being able to share your address—such as living with your family—a man whose wish to know your address hasn’t been fulfilled will probably feel unhappy. In situations like this, the best approach is said to be offering a BATNA—the best alternative that the other party can accept. In other words, you might say, “I can’t share my address, but I’m okay with ○○,” adding something that satisfies him in place of sharing your address. That “○○” can’t be determined from the limited information in your question, so you’ll have to think of it yourself. By the way, when traveling abroad, you do need to know the traveler’s name and passport number, but I don’t think there’s any need to mail the ticket.