I’ve been registered for five years and have been introduced to around 30 people. I have a boyfriend alongside my papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), and I enjoy meeting my papas as something out of the ordinary without it ever becoming emotionally draining. I receive an allowance of ¥50,000 on a pay-per-meeting basis.
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I have about five papas I meet once a month, and I’m having a reasonably good time. But I’ve never had anyone buy me designer items, give me an unexpectedly expensive present—or even really give me gifts at all. Does that mean I’m not attractive enough?
Is it more common for women to register for about six months, find a good papa, narrow things down to one person, and then receive a large allowance or expensive gifts?
When I read everyone’s answers, I sometimes start to lose confidence and wonder if I’m just not very good at living my life. That said, I’m sure women who don’t do papa-katsu would probably envy my lifestyle.
I’d love to hear your opinions.
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Personally, I think that’s perfectly fine.
If you aim for a much higher-paying papa, you may end up selling off parts of your private life and your emotional well-being too.
Five meetings at ¥50,000 each would give you an extra ¥250,000 a month. As long as he doesn’t interfere excessively with your boyfriend or your personal life, I’d say that’s the ideal kind of papa-katsu.
There are women who don’t get any offers at all, so having five papas like that would be more than enough.
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I’m Fullerene!
> Is it true that most people stay registered for about six months, then narrow it down to a few good papas, meet them, and receive generous allowances and gifts?
Where did you get that information?
There may be a clue there.
If you met someone the same number of times, which would you prefer:
an allowance of 60 plus 40 worth of gifts, or
an allowance of 100 with no gifts?
Most people would probably choose the latter, right?
But the former looks more impressive.
Take a moment to really think about the posts here from people who have actually experienced this firsthand.
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Maybe it’s because he’s a pay-per-meeting papa once a month. He may feel that you two aren’t close enough for him to give you presents.
Honestly, getting an extremely expensive gift from someone you only see once a month would be kind of scary.
Earning 250,000 yen a month through light papa-katsu seems pretty efficient to me.
Personally, though, I prefer a different style: light, pay-per-meeting papas only last about two years at most, whereas I like seeing a generous papa around ten times a month and having it continue for more than two years.
When I decide I really like someone, I tend to fall for them completely. I don’t mind playing the devoted partner for them, even if it’s just for show—not only in bed, either….
With one generous papa, I told him, “Make me your slave,” on our third date, and that’s how we became a monthly arrangement.
And with my most generous papa, back when we were still seeing each other pay-per-meeting, I tearfully pressed him, saying things like:
“I don’t want to believe you’re seeing other girls. If you have other girls, I can’t be with you anymore!”
He was taken aback and said, “But we’re not even dating.” Still, he eventually became what you’d call an ultra-generous papa who gives me very expensive gifts.
But from society’s point of view, no matter how much money or how many expensive gifts he gives me, having a deep relationship with a papa twenty years older than me isn’t exactly something to be praised. I don’t need presents anyway, so I’m perfectly happy just building up my savings in cash.
Once you come over to this side, it’s like you can’t go back. Personally, I envy the girls who keep things light….
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I’m Zuiki, a male member who believes in knowing when you have enough.
You must be able to rotate between as many as five papas without becoming emotionally drained because you’re attractive and good at navigating life.
And because you’re attractive and good at navigating life, you even have a boyfriend on top of that!
Getting gifts has nothing to do with your own attractiveness or how well you live your life. It simply comes down to whether you happen to meet a weird papa like me who enjoys giving presents.
Besides:
¥50,000 × 5 people × 12 months = ¥3,000,000
¥3,000,000 − ¥1,100,000 = ¥1,900,000
¥1,900,000 × 0.1 = ¥190,000
¥3,000,000 − ¥190,000 = ¥2,810,000
You already have ¥2.81 million in annual take-home gift income. Is that still not enough?
Have a little more confidence in yourself!
That’s my personal opinion as someone who believes in knowing when you have enough.
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I’ve never received any shockingly extravagant gifts either. I have been given accessories for my birthday and Christmas, though. And I also give my papa gifts for his birthday and Christmas.
I can only speak from my own experience, but customers at the club sometimes give us things under the guise of gifts, clothing expenses, or date expenses. The girls who work at the venue also receive all kinds of presents.
But none of them ever asks outright to have something bought for them. So if you want designer gifts, I think working part-time at a club or lounge gives you a good chance of receiving them without having to ask.
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> I can understand why women who don’t do papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) might envy my lifestyle.
To begin with, it’s strange that you would even have that perspective.
If there were no need for it, neither men nor women would engage in papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) in the first place.
Rather, unless you envy the women and men who don’t do papa-katsu, you can’t truly appreciate its deeper side.
Because it’s something nobody does—or wants to do—it becomes a world where only a very small number of men and women can enjoy its hidden depths and make the most of it.
It’s a mysterious world where women can receive gifts worth millions of yen, even while behaving however they please.
Ultimately, it comes down to how much attraction you can convey, whether you’re drawn to each other, and whether you can build a relationship.
If the men you meet are all only seeing you about once a month, then that isn’t truly lively and enjoyable papa-katsu. It’s nothing more than a relationship where you simply meet once a month.
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I hardly ever received anything in the past, and I’m the type who prefers to buy things for myself.
Recently, though, I’ve been receiving gifts more often. I think I get more presents for my kids than for myself, though! Mostly necessities for everyday life, too.
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Is it really that important to have your papa buy or give you presents?
I’m in a pretty similar situation myself, but I tend to think, “I can just buy it myself.”
Of course, I do feel jealous when I see those glamorous papa-katsu girls on Twitter and elsewhere online. But they’re usually complaining about their pretty awful papas too, so I end up thinking, “They must be dealing with their share of hardships as well.”
As for getting presents, I think it’s important to give something yourself first. It doesn’t have to be anything expensive—just a little something is fine!
Like, “I went to ___ recently, so I got you a souvenir,” or “This was delicious, so I wanted to share some with you.”
When you do that, the other person will often return the gesture.
You can’t do papa-katsu if you have no appeal, after all! Keep your confidence and do your best!
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This is my second year registered with SALON.
I’ve been introduced to far fewer men than you have.
I’ve never received an extremely large allowance or an extraordinarily expensive gift. I don’t consider myself anyone particularly special, so it doesn’t surprise me at all.
When I played golf with someone, he bought me a golf bag on the spot. Another time, while we were messaging on LINE, a papa (a male supporter) bought me a complete golf outfit. I was genuinely very happy about those gifts!
Isn’t it less about the price? Even if something is expensive, wouldn’t you be troubled if it were an accessory you didn’t like and would never wear?! Of course, if it were a brand you wanted, you’d be happy.
Personally, I don’t think I’m suited to papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), and I don’t want to put up with things, so I’ve never thought about going that far just to have someone buy me something—or a designer brand item.
If you’re enjoying your current situation and aren’t forcing yourself, I think that’s perfectly fine. No one really knows how much of the talk about huge allowances and expensive gifts is true or false.
I don’t think comparing yourself to others will do you any good.
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I think gifts worth astonishing amounts are usually given by men who genuinely enjoy giving presents and have plenty of money to spend, in the hope of winning the feelings of a woman they find attractive.
For example, I heard about a woman who had received a gift worth several million yen. She was practically living with her papa (a male supporter), and whenever she stayed at his place, she apparently gave him massages until he fell asleep. After hearing that, I could understand why he wouldn’t mind occasionally giving her gifts worth several million yen—if a woman was willing to do that much for him.
The person asking the question envies women who receive expensive gifts, but are you offering your partner something comparable in return?
I’ve also heard of arrangements involving shared GPS locations and a monthly allowance of over one million yen. I personally have no desire to monitor a woman’s movements via GPS, so I couldn’t understand it at all, but apparently the woman was considering whether to accept the offer.
I’ve even heard about someone who went to a pay-per-meeting arrangement offering 500,000 yen, introduced by a scout, only to find a white-powder party taking place and flee home.
What I’m trying to say is that huge gifts and generous allowances catch people’s attention because of the numbers, but aren’t we ignoring too much of the context behind them?
Comparing yourself with others and agonizing over it is already a hollow exercise, but comparing yourself based solely on numbers that have taken on a life of their own is even more pointless.
If you want expensive gifts or a generous allowance, rather than simply envying others or comparing yourself to them, I think it’s more constructive to seriously consider what you can do to obtain that for yourself and work toward it.
My advice is: “I don’t think you should judge an arrangement based only on the superficial numbers,” and “It might be time to graduate from comparing yourself with others.”
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