We meet two or three times a month under a 100,000-yen monthly arrangement, but sometimes my period starts around our third meeting, and my papa cancels every time. His reason is that if we can’t go to a hotel, there’s no point.
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I’m fine with just having a meal, and I’ve told him that once, but nothing has changed. Since dinner-only (no intimacy) isn’t an option, I’m left feeling frustrated.
We tried a pay-per-meeting arrangement before, but then we only met once or twice a month.
Would it be okay to bring this up again? Or, since he knows and is choosing to turn me down, should I just let it go?
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂Not stated👑Universe female member
Aren’t you also dating him solely for the money?
If so, you can’t really complain if he’s accused of only being interested in your body—it goes both ways.
From the man’s perspective, the arrangement is based on having an adult relationship (intimate) two or three times a month.
So if you’re on your period and can only meet for dinner, that shouldn’t count toward those two or three meetings.
Try asking him, “Would you like to meet for dinner only (no intimacy), separately from our monthly arrangement?”
If he isn’t interested only in your body, he may still agree to meet, although the allowance might be lower.
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I’m going to be blunt.
To him, you’re his favorite free outlet.
So it’s not that he wants to talk with you.
I think he meets you because it feels like masturbating to him.
But that’s what papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) is, so you don’t need to worry about it.
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I don’t think you should tell him.
In this case, it’s not that you’re unsure how the man feels—he’s made it clear that he has no intention of meeting without sex.
Pushing back against such a clear message is unlikely to lead to a good outcome.
I think you should either accept the situation as it is or, if you can’t, end things with him.
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I don’t think you need to tell him in advance.
It’s clear that this man is only interested in an adult relationship (intimate). He isn’t looking to spend time with you specifically.
If spending time together were his goal, you could tell him about your period after meeting, and he’d probably still enjoy spending time together—whether that meant going for a drive, having a meal, shopping, visiting a theme park, going to the beach or mountains, watching a movie, singing karaoke, touring a model home, or getting a spa treatment.
On the other hand, if the woman is also looking for an allowance for an adult relationship, she should tell him about her period beforehand. In that case, it would be a relationship where both parties are seeking an adult relationship (rather than primarily spending time together).
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I just don’t like setting aside time for dinner only (no intimacy).
Please don’t let it bother you.
Just brush it off as, “Oh, that’s all it was?” I think it’s better to stay quiet and go ahead as planned.
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